Soundscape to Ardor

#381 The Green Point

2012-01-26T14:40:00.003+07:00

James Joyce once remarked how the experience of writing is like climbing a mountain.

When you're in the middle of your climb, you can only see what's directly in front of you and what's directly above you. You can plan only one move at a time. You can't see two or three moves above you or how you're going to get there. Only when you reach the top of the mountain can you look down and gain some kind of an overview of the landscape you've negotiated.

Great analogy. I don't even know if James Joyce really said that, but even if he didn't, I'm sure someone else did.

You do know who James Joyce is, right?

#380 Another

2012-01-25T14:04:00.007+07:00

There was once a student who excelled in both sports and studies. She was kind to everyone. The teachers and students adored her. She's the sweetheart of the class.

But shortly after starting the ninth grade, she died. Some say she was murdered, some say it was a car accident. No one really knew.

At any rate, everyone in the class was completely shocked. Everyone was overcome with grief. Her sudden loss hit everyone really hard.

Suddenly, a student said, "She isn't dead."

And the student pointed to her desk and said, "Look, she's right there, she's alive and well."

Right after, the other students started to say the same.

"He's right!"

"She's not dead!"

That behavior spread through the rest of the class like a chain reaction. Nobody wanted to accept the truth. Everyone in the class continued to act as if their beloved friend is still alive, insisting the cruel fact to everyone on the school. Even the homeroom teached sided with them.

"It's true. She's alive. So you should all continue to work as a team until the day you all graduate together."

Thus, for the rest of the school year, the act continues. The principal even arranged to have her seat included in the graduation ceremony.

After graduation, everyone gathered in the classroom for the class photo. The whole class, including the teacher, were there.

But when they looked at the photo, they noticed something unusual. In the photo, they could see someone who's not supposed to be there.

Her face was deathly pale, but she smiled like everyone else.

It's the dead girl.

---

This is borderline creepypasta imo. It's from Another. A pretty fun series with plenty of random creepy doll shots.

#379 In My Long Forgotten Cloistered Life

2011-11-24T18:42:00.006+07:00

Notice how in the beginning of my last post I wrote something about making a post of my experience as a waiter, but then end up writing none of them in the actual post itself?

Yeaaah.

Whatever. Here's the continuation of the last post.

Like every good kid, the very first thing I did after I got my job is to inform my parents. So I did. Indirectly. Through Twitter. I am such a lovely kid.

And like every good parents, their very first reaction was "How much did you make?". Like I said, lovely.

I honestly thought about sending them a message, you know, something along the lines of "Hey Mom, Dad, looks like all the money you blew on my bachelor degree paid off! I'm a WAITER now! You should be proud of me!", but I'm quite positive they wouldn't take it pleasantly.

(I shall force them to wear this)

Anyway, I told them how much I make. They were... satisfied, to say the least. It's just a part-time job for crying out loud.

Look, I don't earn much working as a waiter, okay? I won't tell you how many dollars I got per hour (company ethicz), but it's adequate for a student.

Let me put it this way. If I got at least 4 shifts of work each week, and proceed to convert all my wages into Rupiah, then in just 80 working hours per month I will earn more money than a fresh graduate working on a bank in Jakarta earn each month.

Yes.

I'm not making that up.

#378 In My Long Forgotten Cloistered Sleep

2011-11-22T18:37:00.004+07:00

I just realized something.

I have yet to make a single post about my experience working as a waiter.

Alright, here goes.

Before I even stepped foot on Sydney, I already made up my mind. I have to find a part-time job to spend my free time and earn extra money. I don't think I need to say this, but a student finding a part-time job here is extremely common, unlike in our beloved homeland. Shops here mostly employ part-time students. Businesses stay alive from part-time students. No joke.

In my first week of college, I ditched a class and went straight to the city to find a job (I sure hope my parents don't read this -__-). Let me tell you, ditching class on your first week of college is BAD! Don't do it kids. I swear, first day of classes are fucking vital, as I later learned.

I took my resume to two places. The first one is KFC, a fried chicken shop no one have ever heard. Really. The second one is an Indonesian restaurant called "Delima". I knew this place from a friend. His friend used to work there, and it's full of Indonesians. Go figure. Both of us dropped our resume there.

Hours after we've left the place, I got a call. Apparently Delima found our resume too awesome to resist (hah! those days as a member of Satoe Indonesia paid off!), they're itching to interview us for a position. Tomorrow.

My friend and I were filled with joy. Barely hours after dropping our resume, we got an interview confirmed. That's way faster than we both imagined! I knew ditching the class was a good idea! (hint: it really wasn't, fuck off)

The day of the interview went... really smooth. After all, they are in need of... waiters.

Naaaah, it doesn't come as a surprise for me, but try to imagine an interview for a waiter position yourself, kay? Here's a hint: Not a single fuck was given for my organizational experiences. When you're applying for a waiter, THEY DO NOT MATTER. Harsh, I know.

Anyway, we nailed it. I sent my resume on Thursday, went for an interview on Friday, underwent a trial on Saturday, and promptly get hired. I thought it was pretty awesome.

All of this happened in the first week of August, which is also the first week of my classes. It's November now. If you're still wondering what happened to the resume I sent to KFC... well, they still haven't call me. Screw them.

#377 In My Long Forgotten Cloistered Dream

2011-11-19T21:42:00.006+07:00

This is what I envision my future girlfriend would be:

Yep, they're all playing World of Warcraft.

bliss

Now this one is peculiar. I mean, blue hair? Really? What kind of---HOLY FUCK IS THAT A LELOUCH POSTER?!

#376 The Date

2011-11-03T12:37:00.002+07:00

It's late, I know, but... yesterday was 2 November 2011.

02-11-2011

or if you put in American style (months come first), it's:

11-02-2011

Which is awesome.

Because it's a palindrome.

11022011

get it?

I fucking love palindromes.

what a day

#375 An Excess of Idiocy

2011-10-08T18:58:00.003+07:00

Berikut adalah penggalan dialog dari film tercinta kita, Ketika Cinta Bertasbih. Ini diambil langsung dari filmnya tanpa editan (SUMPAH).

[telpon]

Azzam: Ya?

Eliana: Sebetulnya aku mau ngasi... mas Azzam hadiah spesial yang aku janjikan waktu itu, tapi... mas Azzamnya udah keburu pulang...

Azzam: Hadiah apa?

Eliana: Mau tau?

Azzam: Hehe.

Eliana: Ehm, ciuman spesial... hehem, hadiah yang nggak bakal mas Azzam lupakan seumur hidup... sebuah FRENCH KISS.

Azzam: Maaf mbak, itu bukan hadiah, tapi musibah!

Eliana: Musibah...? Mas Azzam bisa jelaskan kenapa itu musibah?

AZZAM MENUTUP TELPON.

Eliana: Halo? Halo? Haloo? DAMN! Berani-beraninya ya nutup telpon aku.

writer y u so genius

#374 Waiting to be Served

2011-09-15T18:47:00.003+07:00

Shit's been going down the way I didn't expect.

When I came to Sydney, I was esthatic. I thought, I finally got away from the crappy film-ban situation our nation is experiencing, and am free to enjoy all the mainstream films in Sydney. The only drawback I predict was the unavailability of local films.

Well I thought wrong.

First, the boycott/ban/restriction/whatevar is lifted barely a month after I got to Sydney. Absolute advantage = gone.

Then, it turns out film distribution in Sydney ain't that cool. I originally thought Sydney will get films faster than Jakarta... GUESS AGAIN!

Sure, we get some films faster than Jakarta. You know, QUALITY films like Johnny English Reborn. For fuck's sake.

Now, it seems like all the big films are lining for release in Indonesia. Meanwhile, I'm stuck here in Sydney staring in amazement on how Harry Potter 7 is still screened.

The Tree of Life, aaah, The Tree of Life. One of the most talked films of year, the one I'm sure to miss watching in cinema. When it was released, Indonesia still suffer from the blockage, which means no The Tree of Life in cinema for us. I arrived at Sydney, right at the week where local cinemas stopped screening The Tree of Life. And now, Indonesia is screening the film. Fuck. My. Life.

You know my most anticipated film right now? Drive. An action film starring Ryan Gosling (huge mancrush). It's US release is 16 September (today! gasp!). Aussie release? Late October. How nice.

You know the worst part is? Looks like Jakarta will get Drive much faster than Sydney.

I hate this feeling. This feeling where everyone else have watched the movie yet you're still waiting for it. It's like sitting at a table with your friends in a restaurant, and you're the only one whose order hasn't arrived. You got sick of waiting while your friends started to enjoy their meal. It's that terrible.

Fuck it. I'm gonna miss out on discussing them on the film board I frequent. I have to make sure to tiptoe past all the spoilers for my own safety. I have to watch in envy and agony at people who've enjoyed the film already.

Life just don't go the way you wanted.

#373 Rage

2011-08-20T20:46:00.000+07:00

Fuck.

#372 Poor Leo

2011-08-03T17:48:00.000+07:00

Hahaha

#371 The West Exit

2011-07-29T23:03:00.002+07:00

Finally got a chance to hang in the city with my friends.

No signs of Russian sushi shops, flying vending machines, or a black motorcycle without headlights.

Disappointed? Well... not really. Who in their sane mind would expect them anyway...?!

...

You must remain you.

#370 Home Sweet Home

2011-07-26T13:50:00.003+07:00

It's been a week since I started living in Sydney. Have I settled in? Not yet. Have I made any friends? Not yet. Do I care? Not yet. Do I feel lonely to the point of suicide? Not yet.

I haven't made any friends here, but it doesn't mean I don't have any. Some of my old friends are joining me here, that is, my dear friends from SBM. So it's like... SBM part 2... lame, I know.

But right now, it's just mostly me and my dear friend Gede. Just the two of us. Everyone else have yet to arrive. Ain't that romantic?

Okay, calm down. Sooner or later we'll make some new friends. We just need some time to... properly adjust to our new environment. This isn't Bandung you see... I mean, it took less than 3 nights living in Bandung for me to proudly announce "I LOVE THIS PLACE! THIS IS MY SECOND HOME!". Here? Don't think so.

My classes start next week, so I have virtually nothing to do this week. At least I've been trying to satiate my movie hunger. I went and watched 3 films in local cinema already. Just fyi, those three movies I watched are Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2, Transformers: Dark of the Moon, and Mr. Popper's Penguin. Some quick thoughts: Harry Potter is epic. Transformers is dumb, as expected though so no complaints. Mr. Popper's Penguin is mostly a forgettable Jim Carrey vehicle.

I can't wait until classes start rolling in. I can't believe I wrote that... but I really mean it.

#369 New Game+

2011-07-23T22:49:00.004+07:00

It is with great pleasure to announce that I have moved to the next chapter of my life. Yes, I think of my life as some kind of game or book or a Tarantino film, eh but I digress. Ladies and gentlemen, I have moved to Sydney in a neverending mission to pursue education. To put it in another way, I will be living here for about a year to get my master degree.

I arrived safely (obviously) in Sydney on Wednesday, and let me tell you, the weather is a bitch. The day I arrived, it switched between heavy rains to drizzle to clear sky to STORMY WIND in an interval of seconds. But mostly it just rains pretty hard.

I kid you not. It's like I'm travelling in One Piece's famed Grand Line. And it lasts for DAYS. See, if a little girl would make a diary about her days in Sydney, it'll probably be something like this:

DAY 1
It's raining really hard.

DAY 2
It's raining really hard.

DAY 3
It's raining really hard.

I'm on my fourth day now, and thankfully the rain has stopped. If it lasts any longer, I would probably lose my mind faster than I expected.

Anyway that's it for now. It's 02.00 in the morning and I can't sleep, just wish me luck for my new life. I'd most probably blog most of the stuffs happening with me here. Gee, coming down to Australia and blogging your experience, ain't that original?

#368 I'm Leaving on a Jetplane

2011-07-19T11:18:00.001+07:00

Will be leaving... tonight!

Off to new land!

#367 It's A Crazy Fuckin' World

2011-07-03T19:29:00.004+07:00

"Where'd you get that suit? What's that suit?"

"It's a suit."

"What, do you think it looks good on you?"

"What?"

"Looks gay. Are you gay?"

"Fuck off, will you?"

"It's a serious question. I don't care if you're gay or if you're not gay, you know? It's alright if you are, mate. I just want you to tell me about it, you know? I don't care whether you're gay or you're not gay. I just want you to talk to me about it, you know?"

"..."

"Making yourself a drink?"

"Yep."

"What is it?"

"It's a bourbon and coke."

"Bourbon and coke's not a very gay drink, mate. I, I think... look, if you're a gay man, if you are, and you want to make yourself a gay drink, just go ahead and make yourself a gay drink. You know what I mean? That's what I'm talking about, mate. I just want you to tell me things. You know, it just kills me to see you living a lie."

"Look will you fuck off!? Seriously."

"What do you think we should do?"

"I think we should be there for Cath and the family and that."

"What are YOU gonna do, Darren?"

"It's wrong and all that but, you know..."

"You know, if Baz was still here right now, and we'd just been to your funeral, we wouldn't be having this conversation. 'Cause he'd have already done something about it. If you don't want to do anything because you're scared... is it because you're scared? It's alright if you are. I just want you to tell me about it. Just talk to me."

Loved this conversation. Animal Kingdom is fucking awesome... should've watch it sooner... now I feel like revamping my 2010 list. <_<

#366 Pixar, What the Fuck is Wrong with You?!

2011-06-28T22:27:00.004+07:00

Jeez! Pixar, just what the fuck is wrong with you?! You used to be cool! You used to be that one kid who stood out amongst all the other kids in the class thanks to your great sense of humor and awesome personality!

First, you scrapped some of your future projects in favor of some sequels (Newt immediately comes to mind, and I really think it looked interesting). Thus, Toy Story 3 came. Thankfully it turns out fine since it's awesome and a ended the story perfectly. It's cool. You got yourselves an Oscar, thoroughly deserved.

Then you make Cars 2, which DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. Cars is regarded as your worst film, both critically and commercially. Why would you make a sequel out of that?!

But then we find out that Cars' merchandise generated over $5 billion in revenue. Suddenly everything MAKES SENSE.

You're aiming for those merchandise $$$.

Now look, I've been a fan of you guys since the first Toy Story, and just for your information, I'm also a business student graduate. Sooo yeah I can see some sense in the situation and respect your decision to get more profit. I mean, the opportunity is there so why not just go and grab it right? Right...

Nevermind that Cars 2 is now regarded as your worst film ever. You won't care right? You'll still be swimming in the merchandise money, and at the same time learning that you don't need to make a good film to make lots of money... oh god, did I just wrote that?

Oh come on now, I'll try and be optimistic. This is probably just a minor deviation. Brave looks interesting, can't wait to watch it next year. Still...

WHY, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO MAKE TOY STORY 4 ?! WHY PIXAR, WHY?!?!?! WHAT HAVE GOTTEN INTO YOU?!?!?!?! YEAH IT WILL PROBABLY BE GOOD, BUT THAT. ENDING. WAS. PERFECT! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!

T_T

#365 Attraction Equation

2011-06-17T16:15:00.002+07:00

The bottom sentence reads: "These variables go from 0-1. For example women scoring x zero on "looks" for men means a total score of zero.

Which means, no matter how funny or smart you are, if you're ugly = die.

That's awful.

jiahahahahahahahahah

#364 Smoked Desert Dumplings

2011-06-15T12:52:00.004+07:00

AWKWARD is...

...when your parents caught you and your male friend watching gay porn in the livingroom.

Yeah.

Assuming this situation somehow happen to you (and you both are completely straight for hilarity's sake), what're you gonna say to them?

A. "It was his idea!" *points at your friend*

B. "Goddamnit! Look, that bastard gave us the wrong CD!"

C. "We thought it was normal porn!"

D. "We are merely observing this peculiar behavior in human relationship that happens to be the topic for our english debate next week, therefore it is necessary for us to conduct a firsthand research by watching this CD beforehand."

E. "We are watching it for the plot! I swear the story is really good!"

F. "DON'T JUDGE US!"

G. "We thought it was the new Glee episode!"

H. "Hey guys! Wanna join us...?"

No it did not happen to me. I'm just writing this out of curiosity. Completely random, I know.

#363 Source Code (2011)

2011-06-02T17:52:00.002+07:00

Groundhog Day meets Inception. That's what everyone said.

Well, I've no choice but to concur with the masses. Source Code is really best described as a hybrid between Groundhog Day and Inception. Still, I slightly enjoy Source Code more than those two films.

I mean, there is a reason why Source Code is one of the best reviewed major film of the year so far. No kidding. Go look around the net.

Done looking around? Alright, let's get into the film.

Colter Stevens (played by Jake Gylenhaal), is unwillingly thrust into the Source Code, a program that allows him to dwell into an alternate universe and get inside someone's body in his last eight minutes of his life.

Colter went into Sean Fentress' body, a teacher who died to a train explosion. Colter's mission is to find who set the bomb in the train, as it will allow them to prevent subsequent attacks by the perpetrator.

This causes Colter to experience Sean's 'death' over and over again, as he repeats that 8 minutes trying to find the culprit. Along the way he try to piece together his fate, how he got to the Source Code in the first place, and grew attached to Christina (Michelle Monaghan), a woman he sat with in the train.

At the beginning of the film, Colter woke up in Sean's body, completely and utterly confused. We as the audience are forced to share his confusion. Subsequently, we share Colter's desperate attempts and weariness throughout the film as he alternates between finding the bomber and learning of his eventual fate, all of which are delicately presented and crafted by director Duncan Jones and writer Ben Ripley.

And then comes the climax. Surprisingly, it's not when the culprit is found (very minimum spoiler here). It involves a highly emotional phone call that nearly destroy my manliness card, followed with a capture of a completely heartwarming scene I even forgive that one girl in the theater who started a slow clap all by herself when it happened.

Fun fact: Duncan Jones is David Bowie's son. Okay that got nothing to do with everything but whatever, I'll keep an eye for his future works.

9/10

#362 The Lincoln Lawyer (2011)

2011-05-25T15:14:00.003+07:00

You know you're watching a well-made film when it combines future plot-devices and characterization delightfully, like The Lincoln Lawyer does.

The Lincoln Lawyer follows Mickey Haller (played by Matthew McCounaghey), a criminal defense attorney who drives a Lincoln Town Car, hence "The Lincoln Lawyer" (duh).

One day, Mickey stumbles upon a case where his client is accused of assaulting a woman. Louis Roulet (played by Ryan Phillipe), the client, claims innocence. As Mickey starts to investigate, he realizes his client may not be as innocent as he previously thought... It's all up to Mickey to outmaneuver his adversary through all possible links.

Even though it doesn't really offer anything new, The Lincoln Lawyer is a delicately written legal thriller filled with twists and turns that keeps the plot moving at an entertaining pace. It pushes the audiences to guess, root, and wonder right until the end.

Matthew McCounaghey plays the lead brilliantly, you'd forget his usual goofy persona commonly found in his romcoms. Still, I reserves some praise for Ryan Phillipe, who seems to effortlessly play the villain; an arrogant rich kid with an intimidating confidence.

The only thing that bothers me is some of the director's touches. I particularly hate those quick zooms to the character's faces, it's pretty distracting. Anyhow, for me The Lincoln Lawyer is one of the most entertaining films of the year so far.

8.5/10

#361 A Little Thing Called Love (2010)

2011-05-24T14:44:00.003+07:00

(also known as Crazy Little Thing Called Love)

Blargh.

Here's a film that could make things simpler and achieves the same thing yet decides not to. It dragged unnecessarily for nearly two hours thanks to a terrible shift in tone. I swear, they can cut like 20 until 30 minutes by removing some pointless 'comedy' scenes and reworking the last third of the film.

'Love' is a simple and generic tale of a girl dealing with her first crush in middle school. It's filled with plenty of generic jokes enough to satisfy the simplest of mind, and it ends with a wonderful and inspiring lesson about love that is nothing like we've ever heard before.

You know, things like; "LOVE IS THE ULTIMATE STRENGTH", "I AM SUCCESSFUL THANKS TO THE POWER OF LOVE", "LOVE IS SO GREAT IT MAKES YOU PUKE RAINBOW AND SUGAR" oh fuck off.

It also has a girl called PIMCHANOK LEUWISETPAIBOON who plays the leading girl. She's pretty cute especially when she had DAT PONYTAILS (mmm, ponytails). Meanwhile, the leading male is played by Mario Maurer, whom I deeply hate. He's handsome (coming from a straight man here), young, and talented. Fuck this unfair world.

Yeah, this film triumphs in terms of acting. Both leads were great in their roles, and the supporting casts are pretty solid. It also looks good, y'know, technical things. Sadly, it's pretty hard to enjoy it if you aren't a 12-year-old girl.

5/10

#360 Conquering the Block

2011-05-23T20:35:00.003+07:00

May breezes by with barely any posts in this blog. I myself can't explain what went wrong.

I got some awesome materials to write (ranging from Osama Bin Laden to UFOs) but they never went past the idea stage in my head, now they are (sadly) obsolete.

I got two short stories halfway done and I suddenly lost interest in finishing them.

I got stocks of film-related posts ready, but for some reason I don't feel like posting them.

uuuuuuurgh what the fuck went wrong here

talkingtomyselftalkingtomyselftalkingtomyself

*sigh*

Time to get my head straight.

Starting from tomorrow, I'll post them all. Film posts, that is.

On a side note, I really want to watch Children Who Chase Lost Voices from Deep Below and Tree of Life. :(

#359 Yesterday Was Friday the 13th, Bitches!!!

2011-05-14T10:26:00.004+07:00

Got this from Voldy7. Pretty neat, heh.

Nothing spectacular happened yesterday, except me getting a slight fever. Phew.

#358 I May or I May Not

2011-05-11T13:20:00.003+07:00

I am seriously contemplating to stop posting my film writing here. I've done a couple of them now (Lincoln Lawyer, Mirror Never Lies, etc) but I really don't feel like posting them.

Can't really explain why.

Hmm...

*first post of May*

#357 The Royal Blowjob

2011-04-30T10:33:00.002+07:00

This is too epic to pass up.

Look at that child! The horror of having to see the royal penis must have completely shatter her mind---she decided to cover her EARS instead of her EYES! Poor girl.

#356 MAL

2011-04-28T15:57:00.002+07:00

I set up a MAL account yesterday.

rofl

http://myanimelist.net/animelist/Typhlosion2002

yea I used my GFaqs ID since someone already took GrimmJaw

It's pretty fun. Turns out I've watch over a thousand of anime episodes... and don't get me started with mangas.

But it's still nothing compared to some other folks over there. Yaiks. Never an otaku, never. Hopefully.

now it's time to fade out and go back to hide my power level

#355 Poor Gibson (Just Kidding)

2011-04-27T13:18:00.009+07:00

Arsenal blew their season again (shocker!), therefore to vent my anger I decided to post amusing stuffs about other team. It's much healthier than burning a kitten to death.

This time, it's about DARRON GIBSON. A Manchester United player (scum). About how his twitter account only lasted for two fucking hours, thanks to a torrent of abuse from MANCHESTER UNITED FANS.

("My own supporters hate me!" moan Gibson. No one cares, apparently.)

After setting up his twitter account, @dgibbo28 (silly name, I know), countless of fans started to send him negative comments about how he's crap. You know, things like:

"@dgibbo28 you are shit, fergie will sell you off in the summer #justsaying"
"@dgibbo28 u offer nothing to united. Do us all a favour and hand in a transfer request u spud"
"@dgibbo28 your fucking awful, get out of the club."

...and our dear Gibson closed his twitter account. Barely two hours after he set it up.

Of course, those people are only allegedly Manchester United fans. For all we know they could be Manchester City fans. Or Arsenal fans. Or even Barcelona fans. Or heck, Persisam Samarinda fans. Though some are less subtle in their allegiance...

(totally a Chelsea fan, am i rite?)

Here are some other compliments received by Gibson:

Even Carrick got dragged on... truly the worst possible insult a player can get. Not even Clichy deserve that.

Of course, some were quick to dismiss the report. Rio Ferdinand, another Manchester United player (scum), said the reason Gibson deleted his account has got nothing to do with the insults. Oh come on. It's pretty nice of you to stand up for your teammate, but you can't fool us. Gibson can't handle the insults. End of story.

In a completely unrelated news, Wenger is still in state of despair after the last game against Bolton. Perhaps he need to tell Clichy and Rosicky to set up a Twitter account.

(picture taken from arsetumblr)

#354 With the Blue Sky

2011-04-21T10:24:00.004+07:00

Yesterday I bumped into Sora Aoi (or Sola? Whatever) by accident. Yes, she's here. In Jakarta. To promote Suster Keramas 2, her new movie. In the same building where I currently work.

I was in the lobby, on my way out after a tiring day at work. Yes you read that right. Suddenly she pops out from the lift accompanied by a dozen of JAPANESE BODYGUARDS. Without thinking much I greeted her and request we took a picture together. She agreed. Me so happy~

I wanted to say "I'm a big fan!" but wouldn't that be awkward? Especially when your parents are right there. It's not like I can speak Japanese either... I ended up saying ARIGATOOO to her in a stupid way.

Here is the picture:

If you're wondering "WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH THE TROLLFACE?!" well you see, I had this goofy grin in my face (sumpah muka gw mupeng banget) therefore I had to cover it for your pleasure. I can't help it dude. Sora fucking Aoi is right beside me! You try putting a straight/cool/calm/composed face when taking a picture with Sora Aoi, I dare you!

eh, even if I didn't put a ridiculous smile back then, I still won't post my face here. You know the rules.

Perhaps you are unconvinced that it's me ("HEY THAT COULD'VE BEEN SOMEONE ELSE!"), I really got nothing to convince you unless you're a close friend and you can see me putting this picture, uncensored, as my BlackBerry Messenger display pic. Either way, I really did met her. And I'm fucking proud.

Hell yeah Sora Aoi.

#353 Killing Productivity

2011-04-19T13:17:00.002+07:00

This is my most productive season... animu-wise. Six in a single season. Yep. Never an otaku. Never.

The ABCs of Blooming
We Still Don't Know the Name of the Flower We Saw that Day
C: The Money of Soul and Possibility Control
Electric Wave Woman and Youthful Man
Steins;Gate
Gambling Apocalypse Ultimate Survivor Kaiji season 2

(I'm trying to make it sound much more awesome than it should be *wink wink*)

Thinking of picking Everyday Life... probably later.

#352 '?' (2011)

2011-04-11T16:35:00.002+07:00

(tanda tanya)

Baru beberapa menit film dimulai, '?' sudah memperlihatkan hal yang cukup ofensif. Segerombolan pria muslim bersinggungan dengan seorang pemuda oriental. Salah satu pria muslim mengumpat "Sipit!" dan si pemuda oriental membalas "Teroris! Asu!".

Lalu mereka berantem. GELUT! Gebug-gebugan...!

Gw ngakak. Lawak. Ternyata film beginian toh... ngumbar-ngumbar hal eksplisit yang jatohnya bakal jadi khotbah standar. Dimulai dari adegan ini, gw mulai membenci film ini.

Mengambil setting di Semarang, '?' mengisahkan kehidupan beberapa individu dan konflik-konflik yang mereka hadapi. Konfliknya berbagai macam, dari agama, karir, sampai yang paling penting: identitas.

Ada Soleh (Reza Rahadian), seorang pria pengangguran yang berusaha untuk membuktikan bahwa dirinya layak menjadi seorang suami ke istrinya, Menuk (Revalina S. Temat), seorang wanita muslim yang bekerja di restoran oriental yang menjual makanan halal sekaligus haram.

Di restoran itu sendiri Menuk menghadapi konflik dengan Hendra (Rio Dewanto), anak pemilik restoran yang pernah memiliki hubungan dengannya. Hendra sendiri bermasalah dengan orang tuanya perihal cara pengelolaan restoran tersebut.

Lalu ada juga Rika (Endhita), seorang ibu yang pindah agama setelah suaminya memutuskan untuk berpoligami. Ia harus menghadapi cercaan-cercaan yang datang bahkan dari anaknya sendiri. Ia menjalin hubungan dengan Surya (Agus Kuncoro), seorang pria yang mati-matian berjuang meningkatkan karirnya sebagai aktor.

Jalur cerita Rika sebenarnya cukup menarik, tapi sayang, susah bagi gw untuk mencerna ada anak SD yang berperilaku sekritis itu pada umurnya. Selain itu, ada peraturan "show, don't tell" yang dilanggar di jalur cerita Rika. Ia terus menerus meratapi nasibnya yang dicerca oleh banyak orang, tapi kita hampir tidak melihat kejadian tersebut.

Surya, si aktor kelas teri, mungkin memiliki jalur cerita yang paling lemah diantara yang lain. Oke, mungkin kita bisa merasakan perjuangan dan ratapannya (terlebih saat dia berperan menjadi Santa Claus), tetapi jalur ceritanya seakan menghilang di bagian-bagian akhir film.

Bisa dilihat jalur-jalur cerita di '?' sangat berbau forced drama. Untungnya, semua tokoh sentral diperankan dengan sangat baik oleh aktor-aktornya. Balutan musik yang menghiasi film ini juga sangat membantu untuk memainkan mood penontonnya. Plus, dari segi pengambilan gambar, Hanung Bramantyo berhasil melakukannya dengan sangat baik.

Perlahan-lahan, di pertengahan film, gw mulai berhenti membenci dan mulai menikmati film ini. Pesan-pesan moral yang terkandung di film ini mungkin memang hit and miss karena terlalu bejubel dan (kadang) dijejalkan secara eksplisit, toh gw sendiri cukup mengacuhkan pesan moralnya.

Tetapi walau begitu, gw nggak ngerasa diceramahi atau menonton sebuah khotbah. Di akhir film, gw mengaku kalah. Gw nggak bisa membenci film ini. Walaupun cukup mudah melihat kecacatan di film ini, gw menikmati bagaimana film ini berhasil mempermainkan mood gw.

7/10

#351 Best (Not Really) Birthday Evar

2011-04-10T22:45:00.003+07:00

so yeah

kemaren gw diselamatin ultah sama Tika Putri di Twitter:

(real pic no hoax)

That was like, really awesome. If you don't know who she is, she's an actress. She played the leading role in Queen Bee and that one movie with Afgan and Olivia Jensen. She's also really cute:

I made a post about her like years ago... don't remember much myself. She's pretty, that's all that matters. :D

In conclusion: I am awesome. Mwahahahahahah. Oke, thanks buat Nosa yang mengakibatkan ini semua terjadi.

if only yesterday was really my birthday... T_T

#350 Mari Bersepeda

2011-04-07T10:56:00.003+07:00

Mari kita lihat tata cara bersepeda yang baik dan benar. Agar sehat dan GAUL.

Kita lihat yang pertama, contoh yang benar.

Helm pengaman + protektor lainnya + backpack untuk keperluan darurat + wajah yang menampakkan antusiasme cerah = Keselamatan 100% dalam bersepeda, sehat walafiat hingga memiliki anak cucu.

Lalu yang kedua...

Nah, yang ini contoh yang salah.

Tidak ada safety equipment + TIDAK MEMAKAI KAUS KAKI + ROKOK (!) + KERINGAT PALSU (siraman Aqua) = Gagal total, mukjizat bila masih hidup sampai memiliki istri. Motto bersepedanya: "TAK KUAT DI TANJAKAN, TAK BERANI DI TURUNAN".

peace y'all

#349 Oh Hey It's April Fools

2011-04-01T21:28:00.007+07:00

lemme post pictures of my ex-girlfriends

that's right I can smell your jealousy

#348 The Most Anticipated Movie List of 2011

2011-03-29T09:21:00.003+07:00

Here comes the grand list of my most anticipated films of the year! Anyway, you should (you MUST!) care about this list because there's a pretty huge chance that the movie discussed will turn out awesome.

Let me begin by stating that The Tree of Life remained as one of my most anticipated film of the year. It is supposed to came out last year but unfortunately got postponed into this year... do check out the trailer, it looks really intriguing.

So, here's the list!

5. The Steven Spielberg Films

Yessh, this is so unfair. Number 5 is occupied by 2 films, which doesn't make any sense, but I'll force it anyway. The legendary Steven Spielberg will release two movies he directed this year: War Horse and The Adventures of Tintin: Secret of the Unicorn.

War Horse seems like a sappy drama involving a boy and his horse (dear god), my main interest in this film is purely of Spielberg being the director. As for Tintin... well, I've been a fan of Tintin ever since I was little (thanks to my mom), so I'm definitely going to check it out.

Both movies are scheduled to be released in December.

4. Contagion

An action-thriller directed by Steven Soderbergh, the man behind Traffic and Ocean's Eleven. Boasting an incredible cast of Matt Damon, Kate Winslet, Jude Law, Gwyneth Paltrow, Marion Cotillard, and Laurence Fishburn, this movie has all the potential to be big.

It's a film centered on an international team of doctors dealing with an outbreak of a deadly disease. Details of the plot have been scarce, and I'm slightly hoping that it turns out to be a zombie flick... okay I kid.

Soderbergh has another film this year, Haywire, though I'm less enthusiastic on that one. Contagion is set for release in October 21.

3. Children Who Chase Lost Voices from Deep Below

Wow. What a title.

As you might've guess, it's an animated film. And it's JAPANOIS. Which means, IT'S AN ANIME! If that turns you off, kindly move on to the next film on the list.

It is my most anticipated animated film of the year (screw you Pixar for making Cars 2!). Made by Makoto Shinkai, whose previous works include "Voices of a Distant Star", "The Place Promised in Our Early Days", and "5cm per Second" (my goodness, look at those pretentious titles!), 'Children' might be one of the best animated feature to come out from Japan this year.

It tells about a cheerful and spirited girl on a journey to say "farewell". Neat. A better summary can be found in Wiki, but that one sentence is more captivating for me. Knowing Shinkai, this film should focus on characters parting ways in a BEAUTIFUL and GORGEOUS animation. It'll be released in May, so I suppose I'll be able to watch it by the end of the year... with any luck.

2. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

The Hollywood remake of the Swedish film with the same name, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is directed by David Fincher, the director of Fight Club and the recent The Social Network, featuring Daniel Craig (James Bond) and Rooney Mara as the protagonists. Also, the Oscar winner Reznor and Ross combo will do the scoring, which is awesome.

I deliberately avoided the original when it was shown in the local cinema when this remake was announced. My friends who watched it told me that it sucks... curiously, it won the BAFTA. Haha.

Anyway, I'm personally convinced that Fincher was snubbed as Best Director in the Oscars. Hopefully this film will prove the Academy was wrong. The Girl opens sometimes in December.

1. Hugo Cabret

My most anticipated film of the year.

Martin fucking Scorsese.

November 23. Can't wait for it. Everything good comes in November.

#347 The Girl with Weird Wings

2011-03-27T21:38:00.008+07:00

Once, there was a girl.

A lovely and charming girl.

White skin, pretty face and a lovely pair of glasses.

She is good at her studies.

She is also popular in her class.

In addition to being honest.

She has a habit of helping people.

She is a class rep.

A class rep among class reps.

The class rep chosen by god.

What everyone does not know.

That ever since she was little...

Her mother's husband's second wife is her current mother.

And her mother's second husband is her current father.

Confusing, yeah.

To put it simply.

Her parents are not really her parents.

Kihihihihihi~

Then she started showing up to school with bruises and wounds.

She won't admit how she got them.

But of course, we all knew.

We all knew.

But we shall never speak of it.

And thus, one day, as she was walking from school.

She turned into a cat!

Meeeooooooooow~~~~~~~~~

---

I feel like I need to put something along "a boy broke her heart" but I find it hard to fit it. Oh well, long live oddities~

#346 Sambel Pete Durian

2011-03-26T15:27:00.005+07:00

Beberapa hari yang lalu, sebuah obrolan ringan bersama Bleh membuka wawasan gw mengenai satu kepercayaan penduduk kita yang gw belom pernah denger.

Gini...

Jadi, Bleh denger dari temennya, kalo lu nggak suka salah satu diantara SAMBAL, PETE, atau DURIAN, lu nggak bisa jadi orang kaya.

Gile aja lu.

Gw nggak tau asal muasal kepercayaan ini dari mana. Mungkin pencetusnya ngeliat kalo orang-orang kaya tuh suka sama paling enggak satu dari tiga makanan tersebut, terus secara ajaib dia ngeliat deh ada koneksi diantara kesuksesan material dan makanan tersebut. Ato emang dia lagi giting aja terus bikin-bikin teori sendiri.

Yang jelas gw sama Bleh sih cukup intelektual untuk nggak percaya sama beginian. Tapi temennya Bleh (yang nyeritain kepercayaan ini) bener-bener percaya sama teori ini. Sampe-sampe Bleh ngeliat dia makan nasi pake durian, sambel, sama pete. Serius. Jangan tanya gw gimana rasanya durian pake sambel, ngebayanginnya aja udah mual.

Ada-ada aja. Gw nggak bisa ngebayangin Bill Gates makan sambal pete. Ato Steve Jobs makan durian sama temen-temennya di kantor Apple sana. Haha.

(sambal pete, makanan favorit Bill Gates)

Tapi seandainya bener... seandainya loh, peluang gw gimana yak?

Pertama, gw nggak suka pete. Gw malah belom pernah sekalipun makan pete (iye, ngunyah pete di mulut gw aja gak pernah!). Padahal sering dimasakin di rumah... emang biasanya cuma buat penambah aroma aja sih, dan itu emang bikin masakannya jadi enak banget.

Kedua, gw nggak suka banget sama yang namanya durian. Di keluarga gw, cuma gw yang nggak suka sama durian... udah deh, pokoknya gw ada sejarah sendiri sama buah biadab yang satu ini. Awalnya nggak suka, trus sempet suka, trus ga suka lagi, ribet dah, udah kayak kisah cinta anak SMP. Yang jelas jangan coba-coba nawarin es krim durian ke gw.

(musuh bebuyutan)

Terakhir, sambal... gw sih emang nggak suka pedes, jadi gw nggak termasuk fans sambal (orang-orang yang kalo makan wajib make sambal). Tapi nggak jarang juga gw makan pake sambal buat beberapa makanan tertentu... jenis sambalnya juga ngaruh (sambal terasi = imba, sambal kecap juga oke). Jadi yaaaah, itungannya lumayan suka lah.

Satu dari tiga. Oke. Peluang gw jadi orang kaya masih cukup terbuka. Huahahah.

akh tapi ini semua cuma kepercayaan bodoh, huh

bokap gw suka tiga-tiganya~

#345 Los Wonderkids

2011-03-24T21:22:00.002+07:00

Kunjungi blog teman saya yang sinting di:

http://loswonderkids.blogspot.com/

...

Tentang...

Pemain-pemain sepakbola...

saya tidak tahu lagi harus berkata apa

semoga sukses sejahtera untuk kalian semua, jangan lupa untuk makan siang

#344 The Downhill

2011-03-21T18:24:00.001+07:00

Ini adalah ide cerita film pendek yang akan dibuat oleh gw dan Nosa...

Cerita fantastis ini mengisahkan tentang empat pria sekawan yang hendak pergi ke Lembang untuk... bermain sepeda. Mereka sudah menemukan tempat yang asyik untuk dijelajahi dengan sepeda Fixie mereka.

Sayangnya, salah satu dari mereka, COBEK, sama sekali tidak berminat untuk ikut bersepeda. Ia tidak suka bersepeda. Ia lebih memilih diam di rumah dan nongkrongin twitter di laptopnya.

Namun, ada daya, Cobek terpaksa ikut akibat paksaan teman-temannya yang tidak ingin membiarkan Cobek ditinggal sendirian. Akhirnya Cobek, Nosi, Bleho, dan Sagat pun pergi bersepeda.

Selama bersepeda, pikiran Cobek terus berfantasi ke dirinya yang berada di belakang laptop. Membaca twitter teman-temannya, membuka situs porno, sampai mengutak-atik facebooknya. Ia melakukan aktivitas bersepeda dengan sangat tidak niat, ia bahkan tidak terlalu mempedulikan Bleho yang jatuh tergelincir ke kubangan lumpur.

Lalu mereka pulang.

Tamat.

...

Nampak ini adalah cerita murahan yang tidak mempunyai makna. Tetapi... sebenarnya cerita ini adalah sebuah metafor luar biasa...

Ya betul, cerita ini adalah sebuah metafor tentang PERANG antara Indonesia dan negara tetangga (tidak perlu disebut).

Disini, Cobek adalah pria rasional yang tidak termakan tren sepeda yang sekarang melanda masyarakat. Sementara Bleho, Nosi, dan Sagat, adalah pria yang sudah terjangkit virus sepeda. Ini merupakan perumpamaan dimana banyak orang-orang lokal yang membenci negara tetangga, namun Cobek cukup rasional untuk tidak ikut-ikutan...

Tapi perang pun terjadi dan Cobek terpaksa dibawa ke medan perang bersama teman-temannya, walaupun ia lebih memilih untuk hidup dengan damai di rumahnya. Perjalanan mereka dapat diartikan sebagai sebuah petualangan di medan perang...

Selama perang, pikiran Cobek terus melayang ke keluarganya dan teman-temannya di rumah. Adegan pada saat Bleho tergelincir dan jatuh dari sepedanya adalah metafor pada saat Bleho tewas di medan perang akibat ranjau musuh.

Jadi, pesan film ini adalah: Perang itu tidak baik. Kedamaian jauh lebih indah.

Luar biasa. Sungguh luar biasa. Cerita ini ternyata memiliki sebuah makna yang kompleks dan dalam Kami menunggu banyak penghargaan yang jatuh ke tangan kami ketika film pendek ini selesai dibuat.

#343 Exclusive Interview with the Secret Weapon

2011-03-18T20:33:00.008+07:00

Saudara-saudara, ini adalah laporan LIVE dari Kampoeng Bola 2011 yang sedang berlangsung di GSG ITB, dan dengan berat hati kami melaporkan bahwa Tim B SBM sudah GUGUR di pertandingan pertama! BANGSAAAAAT!!!

Kami juga sudah mewawancarai Albi MollenBand, senjata rahasia SBM yang (seharusnya) bermain di TIM B. Berikut adalah cuplikan wawancaranya melalui BlackBerry Messenger:

Saudara Albi, bagaimana hasil pertandingan barusan...?

>Yeah
>Kalah
>Gw ga main lagi dah
>Bangke

Hah?! Apa-apaan ini?! Berapa skor pertandingan tersebut...?

>1-0
>Ga main gw

Apa yang terjadi? Kenapa anda batal bermain?!

>Gara2 urusan pakaian blom jadi lah
>Gg abes

Ini... ini sungguh menggelikan, jadi anda tidak bisa main karena urusan pakaian?!

>Sama prasaannya kek pas arsenal kalah sama birmingham ini

Ugh... itu nggak nyambung brengsek. Ngomong-ngomong, tim apa yang kalian lawan?

>Patra
>Minyak

Oooh. Lalu bagaimana dengan Tim A? Apakah mereka berhasil melaju ke babak selanjutnya?

>Wkwk
>Tim yos menang
>2-1
>Lawannya gampang
>Yg gw sbnarnya susah wkwk

(musuh Tim A dirahasiakan atas dasar respek)

Ugh... ini sungguh mengesalkan... anda diplot sebagai striker utama Tim B namun sama sekali tidak berkesempatan untuk menunjukkan skill finishing anda yang menakjubkan... baiklah, ada kata-kata terakhir?

>Dah dtg ga maen gg
>Ntn di pinggir lapangan nyet haha
>:(

Sungguh mengenaskan... itulah cuplikan asli dari Albi MollenBand. Tenang SBM, jangan patah semangat. Tim A yang dimotori oleh Yosua berhasil lolos ke babak berikutnya. Ayo SBM! Terus berjuang!

(seandainya ada kesalahan di post ini, bisa diedit kok hihi)

#342 Kampoeng Bola 2011

2011-03-17T20:18:00.007+07:00

Dan Kampoeng Bola 2011 pun dimulai!

Kampoeng Bola merupakan turnamen futsal antar fakultas ITB yang diselenggarakan oleh KM-SBM. Turnamen futsal ini juga dipenuhi oleh pertunjukan band dan dance untuk memeriahkan acara. Ayo, follow twitternya di @kampoengbolasbm! Panitia akan mengundang Irfan Bachdim di final apa bila followernya mencapai 2000 orang :P

Selain itu, sialakan cek trailernya di http://vimeo.com/21143182
made by our friend Ihsan Nur Hadi :D

Tahun lalu, SBM selaku panitia gagal menjadi juara... untuk mereka yang sedikit penasaran bisa dicek Entry #181 dan #182. Tapi tentunya kali ini kita harus mengharapkan hasil yang berbeda.

Mari kita cek sebuah penggalan interview dari Ketua Panitia Kampoeng Bola saat itu:

'Ketua panitia Kampoeng Bola, Yosua Christianto merasa sangat puas dengan hasil yang diperoleh Kampoeng Bola. "Saya puas. Ini acara pertandingan futsal antar Fakultas pertama di ITB." paparnya.'

(diambil langsung dari http://www.itb.ac.id/news/2655.xhtml silakan dicek untuk berita lengkapnya)

Oke, jujur aja deh. Mungkin Yosua (alias Lau Sua, hihihihi) puas sama suksesnya turnamen tersebut dari segi acara, tapi gw yakin dia sama sekali nggak puas sama kegagalan tim SBM menjadi juara. Beruntunglah kita karena Yosua masih bermain di Kampoeng Bola tahun ini, skill bola dan sifat kompetitifnya yang kuat dijamin akan sangat membantu perjalanan tim SBM meraih juara.

Selain itu, tim SBM kali ini mempunyai senjata rahasia yang sangat canggih... yakni ALBI MOLLENBAND

(lupakan penampakan ikan paus di sebelah kiri)

Ya, pria di gambar tersebut adalah tumpuan kita! Dengan kemampuan finishingnya yang luar biasa, Albi yang merupakan fans berat Chelsea ini diyakini akan menjadi top scorer Kampoeng Bola tahun ini. Ayo Albi! Tunjukkan kemampuanmu seperti Fernando Torres menunjukkan kemampuannya saat mengenakan seragam Chelsea! (eh, loh?)

Tapi gw juga mau minta maaf karena tidak bisa menonton langsung pertandingan-pertandingan yang dilaksanakan. Mungkin cukup banyak dari kami para Alumni SBM yang tidak bisa datang dan menonton langsung di GSG, tapi kami mendukung penuh kesuksesan acara Kampoeng Bola dan kancah tim SBM untuk menjadi juara. Ayo SBM! Tunjukkan bahwa kita mampu menjadi juara!

#341 Stalk Me

2011-03-15T12:02:00.000+07:00

follow my twitter

twitter.com/fajargrimmjaw

best twitter in the universe

#340 Calmly Exit Through the Armoury

2011-03-13T20:25:00.005+07:00

Aaaah, suka dukanya jadi fans Arsenal.

Tiga belas hari. Cuma butuh tiga belas hari untuk menghancurkan musim Arsenal. Dalam tiga belas hari itu, peluang (atau harapan) untuk memenangkan empat gelar langsung pupus, sekarang hanya tinggal menyisakan satu gelar, Liga Inggris.

Pertama, kita kalah di final Carling Cup. Melawan Birmingham. Dimana Ben Foster, kiper Birmingham, dinobatkan jadi Man of the Match. Kemungkinan gelar yang bisa diraih tinggal tiga.

Berikutnya, di Champions League, kita takluk di Camp Nou oleh Barcelona, melalui pertandingan menjijikkan dimana Van Persie dikartu merah secara bodoh oleh wasit idiot yang kekurangan gizi. Walau begitu, harus dikatakan bahwa Barcelona menang layak lolos ke babak berikutnya. Kemungkinan gelar yang bisa diraih tinggal dua.

Selanjutnya, kita disingkirkan dari FA Cup oleh Manchester United. Van der Sar, kiper mereka, kali ini menjadi Man of the Match. Di tengah-tengah pertandingan diatas, kita ditahan imbang 0-0 oleh Sunderland dimana lagi-lagi kiper mereka (lupa namanya) menjadi Man of the Match. Ini memang kebetulan atau kiper tim musuh selalu menunjukkan performa terbaiknya ketika melawan Arsenal...? Menyebalkan.

Semua itu terjadi dalam kurun waktu 13 hari (atau 14? huh). Pahit rasanya. Dengan ini, efektif peluang gelar yang bisa kita menangkan hanya tinggal satu: Premier League.

Yah, dari awal kita tidak pernah sesumbar akan memenangkan empat gelar. Wenger hanya berkata "We can win four titles.", bukan "We will win four titles.", semata-mata menunjukkan fakta kalau kita memiliki peluang, mengingat hanya kita satu-satunya tim (di Inggris) yang masih mengikuti empat kompetisi.

Mengenai satu peluang yang tersisa, Liga Inggris, peluang kita masih cukup bagus. Kita hanya terpaut 3 angka dari pemimpin klasemen Manchester United, dan kita masih memiliki satu pertandingan tambahan.

Sudah sepantasnya kita masih yakin akan bisa memenangkan satu gelar di musim ini. Tapi gw geli setelah kemarin melihat ada beberapa fans Arsenal (di beberapa website) yang "pindah tim" setelah kita kalah dari Manchester United.

Baguslah. Arsenal nggak butuh fans seperti itu. We won't miss them, for sure. Sekarang, yang penting adalah terus mendukung tim kita. Iya, kita semua stress, termasuk gw (silahkan lampiaskan agar jiwa terasa lega), tapi ini saat-saat dimana tim kita paling membutuhkan dukungan fansnya.

So for all of you Arsenal fans out there, don't stop lending your support and pray that the opposition's goalkeeper does not produce a once-in-a-season performance. For those pathetic plastic fans who switched sides, calmly exit through the armoury and never return.

#339 Be Fit

2011-03-12T21:04:00.003+07:00

Minggu kemaren gw nginep selama 2 malem di Bandung buat ngurus keperluan kuliah gw. Gw nginep di rumah temen gw, Sigap, bareng beberapa orang temen pengacara (pengangguran banyak acara) gw, termasuk Gede Lila.

Gede ini dijuluki "Si Ganas dari Bali". Sesuai namanya, badannya emang gede dan MENGERIKAN. Di kampus gw, nggak ada yang berani macem-macem sama dia.

Gw udah lama nggak ketemu Gede. Hampir 2 bulan deh kalo nggak salah. Begitu ketemu, hal pertama yang dia ceritain adalah aktivitasnya sehari-hari di Bali. Tiap hari, si Gede ini rajin FITNESS. Katanya biar nggak malu sama bule waktu S2 di Sydney nanti.

Habis ngomong gitu, Gede langsung ngebuka bajunya. BAM

MERINDING GW

Gede yang dulu badannya cuma sekedar gede, sekarang jadi GEDE DAN BEROTOT.

(kondisi tubuh Gede sekarang... oke mungkin nggak seakurat itu tapi tipis lah)

Serius, gw dicolek dikit sama Gede tulang gw langsung kerasa nyut-nyutan. Ato itu emang gw aja yang lemah, ga tau de.

Gede cerita kalo setiap hari dia selalu rajin push-up sama sit-up, sebelum tidur sama sehabis bangun tidur. Gila. Habis ngomong gitu, Gede langsung menjatuhkan diri ke lantai. PUSH-UP. 40 KALI. PAKE SATU TANGAN. Lagi-lagi gw merinding.

Terus dia ngasi satu nasihat yang penting ke gw:

"Lo dari pada nggak ada kerjaan, mending fitness dah."

BENER JUGA!

Gw langsung minta nasihat sama tips-tips buat jadi SIXPACK sama Gede. Yang paling penting (menurut dia) rajin push-up sama sit-up dulu.

Jadilah, dimulai dari saat gw nginep di Bandung itu, gw mulai rajin sit-up sama push-up sebelum tidur sama pas bangun tidur. Wah, gile, ga sabar nih gw, entar kalo gw udah sixpack gw tinggal buka baju trus cewek-cewek bakal ngerubunin gw. Nikmat.

...

sekarang badan gw terasa remuk redam

nggak lagi deh, nggak lagi, sori De

#338 2010 Awards

2011-03-11T15:37:00.004+07:00

(no further explanation is needed)

Films of the Year:

1. Kick-Ass (FUCK YEAR MOVIE)
2. The Social Network
3. The Disappearance of Suzumiya Haruhi
4. Shutter Island
5. The Town

(HM: 127 Hours, edited since I somehow forgot about Shutter Island)

Song of the Year: zts - resurrectedreplayer

Favorite Movie Score of the Year: Kick-Ass

Anime of the Year: Durarara!!

TV Series of the Year: Boardwalk Empire (watch it HBO, kids)

Indonesian Movie of the Year: Sang Pencerah

Character of the Year: Jem Coughlin (The Town)

Anime Character of the Year: A tie between DRRR's Shizuo & Izaya

Game of the Year: Starcraft 2

Memorable Moment of the Year: My Graduation, duh

Worst Moment of the Year: The Netherlands losing the WC Final for the 3rd fucking time

#337 Grey Optimism

2011-03-08T09:43:00.000+07:00

Sooo not going to happen. Worth praying though.

#336 Films You Need To Pay Attention to in 2011

2011-03-07T10:37:00.005+07:00

Naaah, this ain't a list of my anticipated movies (that'll do later), it's simply a list of movie I'm somewhat interested in, and it won't hurt if you do the same.

The Rum Diary
Starring: Johnny Depp
It has Johnny Depp, in a role where he doesn't play an eccentric guy (hopefully). Depp stars as Paul Kemp, an itinerant journalist who travels to Puerto Rico. He begins the habis of drinking rum and becomes obsessed with the woman Chenault (Amber Heard).

Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy
Starring: Colin Firth, Tom Hardy, Gary Oldman, Mark Strong, Stephen Graham
Wooh, what a cast. The movie's synopsis: "In the bleak days of the Cold War, espionage veteran George Smiley is forced from semi-retirement to uncover a Soviet agent within MI6's echelons.".

Hobo with a Shotgun
Machete fans, rejoice! Hobo with a Shotgun is the feature film made from Grindhouse's fake trailers. It's about a homeless man who turns into a shotgun-wielding vigilante that shoots people. Machete of the year, right here.

The Debt
Starring: Helen Mirren
So I've heard it's one of the best movie in Toronto Film Festival last year. It's a remake of an Israeli movie concerning an agent (Helen Mirren) who is sent to kill a Nazi war criminal whom she supposedly kill 35 years ago.

X-Men: First Class
Director: Matthew Vaughn
Starring: James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Kevin Bacon
Release Date: June 3
Wha? That new X-Men movie?! Alright, truth to be told, I really don't care about the X-Men series. But... it's Matthew fucking Vaughn (the guy that made Kick-Ass) and I'm a huge fan of him.

The Descendants
Starring: George Clooney
From the guy who made Sideways. And George Clooney. A land baron tries to re-connect with his two daughters after his wife suffers a boating accident. Oscar bait much?

The Ides of March
Starring: George Clooney, Ryan Gosling, Paul Giamatti, Marisa Tomei
Release Date: December 2011
Another Oscar-baitish movie starring and directed by Clooney. And adaptation of a Broadway play which involves Clooney playing a presidential candidate.

Rampart
Starring: Steve Buscemi, Woody Harrelson, Sigourney Weaver
More Steve Buscemi is always welcomed. This movie is a police drama relating to the Rampart scandal (whatever the hell that is) of the 1990's.

Moneyball
Starring: Brad Pitt, Jonah Hill, Philip Seymour Hoffman
Release Date: September 23 2011
Aaron Sorkin's latest project. It's about baseball. With Brad Pitt.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2
For obvious reasons.

Cowboys and Aliens
Starring: Daniel Craig, Harrison Ford
It's ALIENS with their spacecrafts and laser rays and advanced technologies and deadly explosive beams fighting James Bond and Indiana Jones... sorry Aliens, you got no chance.

Super 8
J.J Abrams latest project. Check out the trailer in Youtube.

#335 I Hate Durians

2011-03-05T21:49:00.001+07:00

There is just something really peculiar with this picture. Hmm.

#334 The Way With(out) Conflict-ion

2011-03-03T18:55:00.002+07:00

Tujuan berikutnya dalam petualangan hidup gw sudah dipilih.

Udah resmi? Belom. Masih dalam proses. Penuh harapan, penuh keyakinan, namun disaat bersamaan penuh keraguan dan kecemasan.

Kontradiksi? Iya, gw tau. Tapi kenyataannya memang begitu. Yang namanya menentukan masa depan itu emang nggak gampang, apa lagi kalau kebebasan yang dilemparkan ke diri lu terlalu berlebih.

Enggak, gw nggak menyalahkan orang lain. Tapi gw juga nggak menyalahkan diri sendiri. Rumit memang. Apa daya, ini semua proses menjadi dewasa. Atau tepatnya, 'lebih' dewasa karena gw menganggap diri gw ini sudah dewasa.

Lantas, apa langkah berikutnya? Gw sendiri masih bertanya-tanya. Ke diri sendiri tepatnya. Silakan kalian anggap konyol tapi gw cukup yakin ini adalah momen dimana bertanya ke orang lain tak lebih dari sebuah pembuangan waktu.

Masih ada waktu. Kalau mau lebih realistis, masih ada BANYAK waktu. Tapi sayang, waktu gw terbatas, dan jumlahnya menipis. Harus mulai bergerak.

Let's go!

(WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST WRITE?!)

#333 Stop Crying Jack

2011-02-28T00:53:00.004+07:00

I am really filled with rage right now. And hate. And anger. And everything else that makes my blood boil.

Anyone got a spare kitten? I need one. I need BEAT THE FUCK OUT OF IT until it stops breathing. With a fucking baseball bat. I'll pay you if I need to. I need it tonight. Like, about now.

Six fucking years, bitch. Six. Fucking. Years. And we fucking blew it.

Really now, I can't even describe this feeling. Nevermind a kitten. I can bash a fucking baby in the fucking head right now.

Goddamnit.

Fuck you, Kosc. Yeah. FUCK YOU! Terrific job there. World class, no doubt. Fuck you so very very much.

Fucking bollocks.

#332 2011 Oscar Predictions

2011-02-27T21:41:00.002+07:00

Less than 10 hours before the award started. By looking at the previous awards (GG, BAFTA, SAG, PAG, DAG, etc etc) this should be it:

Best Picture: THE KING'S SPEECH
(As much as I wanted for The Social Network to win, all signs are pointing for The King's Speech to win. Darn. The Social Network is a much better film IMO)

Best Director: DAVID FINCHER - THE SOCIAL NETWORK
(The King's Speech will get the Best Picture, but Best Director will be given to David Fincher, all the previous awards say so. Though I'm not that surprised if Tom Hooper won.)

Best Actor: COLIN FIRTH - THE KING'S SPEECH
Best Actress: NATALIE PORTMAN - BLACK SWAN
(No brainer. Sucks that Ryan Gosling isn't nominated)

Best Supporting Actor: CHRISTIAN BALE - THE FIGHTER
Best Supporting Actress: MELISSA LEO - THE FIGHTER
(The Fighter should win these two categories.)

Best Adapted Screenplay: AARON SORKIN - THE SOCIAL NETWORK
Best Original Screenplay: DAVID SEIDLIR - THE KING'S SPEECH
(Two of the biggest movies won. Jeez. Surprising.)

Best Animated Feature: TOY STORY 3
(The EASIEST category to 'predict'. It's a fucking given for fuck's sake.)

Best Original Score: TRENT REZNOR and ATTICUS ROSS - THE SOCIAL NETWORK
(It happens to be my favorite OST among the nominees.)

I don't really feel like doing the rest. Inception should've win the technical categories, like visual effects etc. With the Oscar, it's always much more fun predicting the nominations than predicting the winner.

I don't think there'll be any major upset this year, so I'm not surprised if this post right here turned out to be the winning list.

I really, REALLY wanted for The Social Network to win but there's so little possibility of that happening. So instead I'm gonna hope that tomorrow KICK-ASS will win the Best Picture instead even though it doesn't get a nomination.

Oh well.

#331 My BP Nominees Ranks

2011-02-25T21:58:00.000+07:00

Here's my rank on all the Best Picture nominees:

1. The Social Network
2. 127 Hours
3. Toy Story 3
4. Inception
5. The King's Speech
6. The Fighter
7. Black Swan

8. Winter's Bone (me no likey)

Have yet to watch True Grit (do want) and The Kids Are All Right (not really interested).

#330 DisConduct

2011-02-24T15:34:00.004+07:00

I can't help but to share this great article. It's about the film-boycott fiasco.

http://oase.kompas.com/read/2011/02/24/14080684/Go.To.Hell.With.Your.Films

Here, I'll talk the most important things IMO.

Jadi...

Bioskop Indonesia nggak bakal mati akibat boikot MPAA.

Gini-gini. Kita maen statistik.

Tiap tahun, film Amrik yang diputer di negara kita tercinta ini ada sekitar 160 judul.

Dari 160 itu, sekitar 70 judul punya MPAA. Sisanya punya non-MPAA.

Jadi, kalo MPAA ngeboikot, toh masih ada cukup banyak film Amrik yang masuk kesini. Belom lagi, importir non-MPAA itu janji bakal ngimpor film yang lebih banyak tiap tahunnya.

Plus, tiap tahun masih ada film-film lokal yang jumlahnya rata-rata 70 judul setahun. Ditambah film-film negara lain kayak film Korea (banyaaak), Eropa, ato Thailand.

Jadi... kata siapa bioskop-bioskop bakal tutup?

Terus soal pajak... yah singkat aja deh, gw tau banyak orang males kalo udah menyangkut pajak-pajakan. Gw coba sesingkat mungkin.

Pajak buat importir film tuh 23,75% dari share produsen. Ini udah diberlakukan dari DULU.

Tahun 2010 kemaren, pemasukan film MPAA sekitar 765 milyar. Jumlah pajak yang mereka bayar ke kita? Cuma sekitar 5 milyar.

Nah lo. Yang brengsek siapa?

Kalo mau boikot, sana boikot.

(well, this is all assuming the data in the article is reliable)

#329 The King's Speech (2010)

2011-02-23T13:27:00.002+07:00

(12 Oscar nominations lol)

Film ini nyeritain tentang King George VI, bokapnya si Ratu Elizabeth II yang sekarang lagi berkuasa di Inggris. Dia raja yang berkuasa di Inggris waktu jaman perang dunia 2. Sekarang sih dia udah tewas.

Si Bertie (nama imutnya si George) ini raja dadakan. Dia naik tahta gara-gara kakaknya, King Edward VIII, 'ngundurin diri' dari raja biar bisa kawin sama pacarnya.

Keliatannya sih asyik-asyik aja. Tapi... ada satu masalah.

Bertie itu GAGAP.

Lu bisa bayangin nggak sih, ada Raja yang gagap? Coba aja, misalnya di Indonesia, tiap pidato presiden kita ngomongnya begini:

"S-s-s-s-aaudara s-saudara k-k-ku seka-ka-kalian, de-de-dengan i-ini p-p-pajak fi-film imp-p-por ak-akan d-d-d-di-dinaik-k-kan..."

Gw jamin demonya bakal lebih gede dari Mesir kemaren.

Biar bisa sembuh, Bertie akhirnya minta tolong sama Lionel Logue, speech therapist dari Australia. Dan itulah inti cerita dari The King's Speech.

Bertie diperankan oleh Colin Firth, sementara Lionel Logue diperankan oleh Geoffrey Rush, yang lebih terkenal sebagai CAPTAIN BARBOSSA musuh bebuyutannya Jack Sparrow.

(yeah, the one in the left)

Kalo masih sempet, gw bener-bener nyaranin lo semua buat nonton film ini di bioskop. It's a movie everybody can enjoy, and I have this weird feeling that it's going to be THE Best Picture winner.

Hal yang paling menonjol di sini jelas aktingnya Colin Firth sebagai Bertie. Oscar winner? All signs are pointing to it. Aktingnya Geoffrey Rush sama Helena Bonham-Carter (istrinya Bertie) juga bagus, tapi menurut gw sih nggak se-spesial itu.

Selain akting, penyutradaraan sama production designnya juga keren. Do me a favor and watch this while it's still playing.

8.5/10

#328 Sanity's Bond

2011-02-21T10:53:00.003+07:00

Hoaaaaam.

Got a couple of things to write about.

Pertama, soal ditariknya peredaran film Hollywood dari bioskop-bioskop lokal, gara-gara masalah perpajakan yang diusung Menteri tercinta kita Jero Wacik & Presiden SBY. Alasannya? Untuk memajukan film lokal.

Jujur gw nggak terlalu khawatir. Palingan cuma bertahan beberapa minggu, abis itu film-film luar udah nongol lagi. Nggak usah panik lah kawan-kawak, hihihi.

(seandainya gw salah, oke baru gw mau ngomongin lagi :p)

Tanggal 27 nanti (hari Minggu) udah Oscar aje. Gw blom nulis banyak tentang Oscar... gw mesti ngebut nonton King's Speech sama True Grit minggu ini baru bisa mulai nulis-nulis.

So, obligatory Oscar predictions and thoughts should be up by the end of the week.

Terus... awal Maret kayaknya gw udah bisa nentuin film-film yang layak diantisipasi di tahun 2011 ini. Plus, gw juga belom bikin post tentang film-film favorit gw di tahun 2010. Target: awal Maret. Sip.

Satu lagi, gw kemaren maen-maen ke situs film reviewnya LFM ITB (kineklub.lfm-itb.com), trus gw ngebaca review Green Hornet mereka.

http://kineklub.lfm-itb.com/log/2011/02/16/the-green-hornet-2010/

Huahahah, mirip banget sama review Green Hornet gw. Dari Britt Reidnya yang unlikable, perbandingan sama Tony Stark, sampe aksennya Jay Chou. Kesimpulannya tetep: Green Hornet sucks lol.

#327 The Fighter (2010)

2011-02-19T23:14:00.003+07:00

(Christian Bale and Mark Wahlberg in The Fighter)

I always like films set in Boston. Huh. It's perhaps due to the fact that plenty of good films are set in Boston (including the awesome The Departed). Or the accent. Can't decide.

This year, besides The Town, we have another excellent film set in Boston: The Fighter.

The Fighter is based on the true story of Micky Ward (Mark Wahlberg), a struggling boxer who tries to turn his life around.

Micky here, is a weird guy. He is a determined individual, but at the same time, he can't oppose his family; his crack addicted older brother Dicky (Christian Bale) that acts as his trainer, his fucked-up mother Alice (Melissa Leo), and his equally disturbing 7 sisters. Yes, he has 7 sisters.

As a tough boxer, it's pretty hilarious to see that Micky can't even stand up to his family, he even need his girlfriend Charlene (Amy Adams) to speak up for him. Eventually things started to change when Dicky went to jail and Charlene sticks to his side to support him.

(really, Micky is quite a funny guy for a main character)

Dare I say it, I feel that there is nothing special in The Fighter's plot. It's not just the ending, but the entire plot moves in a predictable fashion.

Even the boxing matches itself is just decent (well, at least when compared to say, Raging Bull). I even feel that the second-to-last fight is much better than the final fight itself.

What makes this movie special however, is the great performances by the actors.

The Fighter got 7 nominations in this year's Oscar, with three of them in the acting category. I tell you, 10 minutes into the film, I already feel that Christian Bale deserved his Best Supporting Actor nomination. By the end of this film, I'm not afraid to bet some money for him to win it. His performance as Dicky is nothing sort of amazing. Truly a delight to watch.

Amy Adams and Melissa Leo both thoroughly deserve their nominations. I even suspect Melissa Leo might've been able to get it. Mark Wahlberg also deserves some praise as Micky. Hell, all the performances in this movie (barring the children :p) are excellent.

The joy of watching The Fighter isn't restricted inside the ring. It's what happen outside the ring, whenever each characters interact, that you can feel this film sprung to life. And as you're walking outside the theater, you can't help but get "Head, body, head!" stuck inside your head.

8/10

#326 BEAUTIFUL BARCELONA BEATEN BEAUTIFULLY

2011-02-18T19:17:00.012+07:00

TANGGAL 16 FEBRUARI KEMARIN, LAGI-LAGI ARSENAL HARUS MENGHADAPI BARCELONA

BARCELONA DIGADANG-GADANG SEBAGAI "TIM TERKUAT DI DUNIA", NAMUN PADA KENYATAANNYA MEREKA HANYA SEKUMPULAN MAKHLUK GANAS YANG BERUSAHA MEMBUJUK KAPTEN ARSENAL THE GREAT FABREGAS UNTUK PINDAH KE BARCELONA

(wujud asli pemain-pemain Barcelona)

PERTANDINGAN DIMULAI DENGAN TEMPO TINGGI, BARCELONA DIMOTORI OLEH LION MESSI PEMAIN TERBAIK DI DUNIA, KUAT SEPERTI SINGA

(butuh 4 orang untuk menjaga Messi, itu juga masih kesusahan)

AKIBATNYA ARSENAL PUN KEBOBOLAN DULUAN OLEH DAVID PENJAGA VILLA, SKOR 1-0 UNTUK BARCELONA TAPI ARSENAL BELUM MENYERAH!

DI PENGHUJUNG BABAK KEDUA, SEBUAH HELIKOPTER TERBANG DI ATAS STADIUN EMIRATES DAN MENERJUNKAN SESEORANG

TERNYATA ITU ADALAH VAN PERSIE YANG SIAP MENYELAMATKAN ARSENAL

SEMENTARA ITU DI HUTAN TERDEKAT, ANDREY ARSHAVIN YANG SEDANG BERBURU BERSAMA UNICORNNYA MERASAKAN BAHWA ARSENAL BUTUH BANTUANNYA

TANPA BASA-BASI, MEREKA BERDUA LANGSUNG BERAKSI

(Van Persie menyamakan kedudukan, skor satu sama!)

PERHATIKAN EKSPRESI VALDES KIPER BARCELONA, MUSIM DEPAN IA AKAN DIJUAL KE STOKE CITY

GILIRAN ARSHAVIN BERAKSI, DENGAN BANTUAN UNICORNNYA IA MEMBALIKKAN KEADAAN

(foto ini hanyalah reka ulang kejadian)

ARSHAVIN MERAYAKAN GOLNYA DENGAN MENUNJUKKAN KAOSNYA, GAMBAR DI KAOS TERSEBUT ADALAH MUKANYA SENDIRI

(Arshavin mengenakan kaos dengan gambar dirinya sendiri, fantastis)

KIPER ARSENAL SCZESZYENYZEYN TIDAK KUASA MENAHAN EMOSINYA DAN MERAYAKAN KEMENANGAN

NAMUN KARENA IA TERPAKSA MERAYAKAN SENDIRI IA PUN BERMAIN AKORDION

YANG JELAS, ARSENAL BERHASIL MENAKLUKKAN BARCELONA UNTUK PERTAMA KALINYA DALAM SEJARAH MEREKA! KINI MEREKA HARUS MEMPERSIAPKAN STRATEGI UNTUK LEG KEDUA

(tampaknya taktik ini paling sempurna)

dear god of football please don't let them massacre us in the return leg
(most of the pictures are courtesy of Gunnerrific)

#325 All Fiction, The Parasite Seeing

2011-02-15T14:50:00.002+07:00

Once, there was a boy.

He met a girl.

She was a very charming person, with a charming personality and a charming heart.

Even the awkward boy can't help but feel... comfortable around her.

It is inevitable that he fell in love with her.

There was just one problem.

She was too pretty.

Yes.

Her looks worried the boy.

The boy loved her for her personality and her heart, not because of how she looked.

But he was afraid, what if he actually loved her solely on her looks?

What difference would that be from a fan loving an idol?

An artificial love, born from nothing but physical admiration?

That very thought scared him.

So he decided to do a little test.

One day, he came up to her.

And with his own hands, he ripped her face off.

He scratched, peeled, punched, smashed; literally everything he can do to destroy her face.

What was left from her pretty face is now a bloodied, disfigured lumps of flesh.

With that, he stood over her and realized.

He still love her.

His love... is real.

Ahaha.

Ahahahaha.

Ahahahahahahahahaha~

---

This really don't belong here -_-, but whatever.

#324 Happy Valentine's Day Bitches!

2011-02-14T09:38:00.002+07:00

Look at that picture. Go on, click on it so you can have a better viewing. Start watching from the left, you'll be treated with a bunch of happy couples or groups of people sharing Valentine chocolates.

Now keep scrolling to the right. See that one guy on the right far right of the picture? That's me.

#323 GrimmJaw's IELTS Class Part 4: Defeating the Dreamcatchers

2011-02-13T21:38:00.003+07:00

So... how'd it end up for GrimmJaw?

Let's see...

Listening : 8.5
Reading : 8
Writing : 6.5
Speaking : 6.5

Average'd : 7.5

[/shameless bragging]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

IELTS MAH GAMPANG

GAK USAH BELAJAR, GAK USAH BAYAR KURSUS MAHAL MAHAL

KALO GW KURSUS GW DAPET 9 KALI

HUAHAHAHAHAH

...

ehem

Serius gw. Buat elo semua yang pengen ngambil IELTS, percaya sama gua: IELTS itu gampang. Bukannya belagu ato sombong ato ngocol, gw nggak boong. Gw bukan satu-satunya anak yang nggak ada persiapan apa-apa tapi IELTSnya dapet bagus (sumpah, ada banyak tuh temen kampus gw).

Kalo lo mikir "Yah elunya aja kali yang kepinteran" ato "Sombong lo mentang2 inggris lo bagus!", bzzzztt, gw berani berdebat buat nunjukkin kalo skill inggris gw biasa aja (loh?), demi nunjukkin kalo yang gampang emang IELTSnya.

Yang jelas, kesimpulan dari segala tetek bengek IELTS ini: I really need to improve my writing skills, lol.

#322 GrimmJaw's IELTS Class Part 3: The Best Tips in Town 2

2011-02-11T11:35:00.004+07:00

Alright, let's proceed with the next section!

3. WRITING TEST

In this section, you need to write stuffs. And they expect you to write in PROPER english. Full sentences. Grammar perfection. All those boring textbook things.

That's why, there is just one, single, definite tips to make sure you fail this section.

TREAT IT LIKE YOUR BLOG POST

YES

Write as if your writing on your own personal blog!

THAT'S RIGHT!

Use explicit and offensive words! Write irrelevant things! Screw grammar in the ass! Use parentheticals (like this lol)! Randomly use CAPITAL letters! Go forth and put whatever the fuck you want!

In his test, GrimmJaw was supposed to write an argumentative essay in judging the advantage and disadvantage of constructing a supermarket in the center or the outskirt of a populated city.

But instead, he wrote about THE DANGER OF CAR POLLUTIONS!

WHY?! BECAUSE... HE CAN!

An example of what he wrote:

"...I once heard a story about a guy, who was standing in the side of the street when suddenly he fell and DIE. Turns out he was POISONED by the CAR POLLUTION! I never knew whether this story is true or not, and I never bother to find out, but..."

(paraphrased heavily through sheer memories)

4. SPEAKING TEST

The procedure of this session is simple. The examiner will ask a couple of questions, and you need to answer them. IN ENGLISH.

It is said that you need to answer in FULL AND COMPLETE SENTENCES, so if you want to fail, DO NOT DO THAT. Here, are some quick examples:

THE BAD

IELTS Guy: So, tell me, where are you from?

Emyr: I came from Cirebon.

IELTS Guy: Alright, tell me what's Cirebon so famous for.

Emyr: Well, as a city in West Java, Cirebon is very famous for its local cuisine and traditional batik market---

That's bad. That's REALLY bad. Now here's a the correct one.

THE GOOD

IELTS Guy: So, tell me, where are you from?

GrimmJaw: Jakarta.

IELTS Guy: Alright, tell me what's Jakarta so famous for.

GrimmJaw: Traffic jam!

100 failure points for GrimmJaw.

Don't forget to try and answer the question as absurd as possible. When he was asked to name a hotel and try to give a reason to recommend it to someone, GrimmJaw said:

"Holiday Inn. Y'know, Gautama, a dear friend of mine, once told me that he saw a GHOST in there! So I would recommend this hotel to people who are interested in ghosts."

The facial expression of the tester will be the key to predict your failure. If s/he give you the astonished, startled, or the oh-god-you-are-so-screwed look, then you are guaranteed to fail!

(if s/he give you this face, congratulations! you have failed epicly!)

#321 GrimmJaw's IELTS Class Part 2: The Best Tips in Town 1

2011-02-09T18:55:00.005+07:00

INTRODUCING

GRIMMJAW'S PATENTED 100% FOOLPROOF TIPS TO SPECTACULARLY FAIL YOUR IELTS

Alright boys and girls! Now GrimmJaw will give you young bright people some tips for each part of the test. The tips are designed to make sure you FAIL THE TESTS IN A SPECTACULAR FASHION! Exactly like how GrimmJaw did it!

"Why?", you ask?

COZ ITS FUN!

First of all, here's the thing you need to know. The IELTS itself consists of 4 parts: Listening test, Reading test, Writing test, and finally, Speaking test. Actually it will further increase your chance of failure if you don't know them, but eh whatever.

Alright, let's get started!

1. LISTENING TEST

-Do not concentrate, EVER! Trying to focus and listen to some weird limey speaking really slowly AIN'T FUN! Try to get your mind somewhere else!

Do what GrimmJaw did and don't concentrate on the test. GrimmJaw flew his mind away to the Arsenal game played later in the night. As a result, instead of writing WILSHAM which is the correct answer for one of the question, he wrote WILSHERE instead thanks to the image of Arsenal star JACK WILSHERE.

(Jack never knew his IELTS score but he made a shitload of cash every year)

-Don't let yourself get bored! Trust me, listening to those mumblings are a fucking pain in the mind and ear. You WILL get bored. Those speakers speak very very slowly and they had this annoying Hugh Grant accent which everyone hates.

That's why, try to keep yourself occupied and let your sight, mind, and ear wander off. Look around the class! Look at the faces of other participants! Look at their DESPERATE faces trying hard to pull off the test! LAUGH AT THEIR MISERABILITY (in your heart, obviously), and you will be guaranteed to miss a crucial answer for a question! Precisely like GrimmJaw did!

2. READING TEST

Unfortunately, there are no tips for this section since this part itself is abso-fucking-lutely hard. That's right, you don't need any tips to fail on this section. You WILL fail. You might as well sleep in the duration of this section and still got the same grade as if you tried your hardest to complete it.

It's that hard. Trust me.

Fear.

Despair.

Give up.

tbc

#320 GrimmJaw's IELTS Class Part 1: Why I Took the Test

2011-02-08T16:15:00.005+07:00

FLASHBACK KE NOVEMBER 2010

Semuanya dimulai dari tempat nongkrong paling asyik di Bandung, warung STMJ Dwilingga di Jalan Ganeca. Segerombolan pengangguran SBM 2010 sedang berkumpul sambil membicarakan teman mereka Febrian yang baru saja putus cinta. Bergosip ria, aktivitas standar pengangguran.

GrimmJaw, pemilik dan penulis blog keren ini, termasuk salah satu anak di gerombolan tersebut.

Sampai suatu ketika, sebuah pembicaraan mengenai IELTS muncul. Dua makhluk brengsek dan biadab bernama Fikar dan Jatun bercerita bahwa mereka berniat melanjutkan kuliah di luar negeri. Untuk itu, mereka sudah menjalani kursus selama berminggu-minggu untuk mempersiapkan diri guna tes IELTS yang akan mereka ambil minggu depan.

Bagi yang belum tahu, IELTS (International English Language Testing System), adalah salah satu tes bahasa inggris yang wajib diambil bila ingin melanjutkan kuliah ke luar negeri.

GrimmJaw, setelah berpikir sejenak, merasa... tertarik dengan tes IELTS ini. Ia tidak tahu apapun tentang tes ini, namun kelihatannya... seru. Apa lagi kalau dilaksanakan beramai-ramai dengan teman seangkatan. Terlebih lagi, GrimmJaw sama sekali tidak memiliki rencana atau acara apapun pada hari Sabtu tanggal 29, tanggal dimana Fikar dan Jatun hendak mengambil tes tersebut.

Karena itu, GrimmJaw memutuskan untuk ikut mereka dan mengambil tes tersebut di hari yang sama! Ia tidak memiliki motivasi maupun tujuan yang jelas, tapi ia tidak peduli! Jangankan belum tahu ingin melanjutkan kuliah ke mana, ia bahkan belum tahu ingin kuliah lagi atau tidak!

Yang penting kebersamaan. Asyik asyik aja, ya nggak?

Hari dan tanggal yang disepakati adalah hari Sabtu tanggal 29 November, tepat seminggu setelah pertemuan di warung STMJ. Sehari sesudah pertemuan tersebut, GrimmJaw langsung pergi dan mendaftarkan dirinya.

FLASHFORWARD KE TANGGAL 29 NOVEMBER

GrimmJaw mendapat kabar bahwa dua makhluk terkutuk tersebut MENUNDA ujian IELTS mereka!

ANJING LAH

Karena sudah membayar biaya ujian yang cukup mahal, GrimmJaw mau tidak mau berangkat sendirian ke tempat ujian. Tanpa teman atau satupun makhluk yang ia kenal! Ia terjebak di antara belantara orang-orang dengan impian tinggi! Orang-orang yang ingin melanjutkan perguruan tinggi di luar negeri! Orang-orang yang akan melakukan tes IELTS tersebut dengan sepenuh hati!

Dibandingkan mereka, GrimmJaw datang hanya bagaikan angin lewat. Ia tidak memiliki motivasi yang jelas, niatnya hanya asyik-asyikan dan bareng-barengan dengan teman-temannya. Ia juga tidak melakukan persiapan sama sekali; ia tidak mengikuti kursus IELTS seperti orang kebanyakan ataupun belajar sendiri menggunakan buku.

Bahkan ia datang mengenakan celana pendek dan sendal jepit kesayangannya, yang mengakibatkan beberapa peserta ujian memandangnya dengan cemohan. Bahkan ada yang menertawainya ketika namanya dipanggil pada saat absen! (kalo gw ketemu orangnya, gw tonjok lo grrr)

GrimmJaw hanya ingin semua ini cepat berakhir.

#319 The Green Hornet (2011)

2011-02-07T17:26:00.009+07:00

(featuring Jay Chou as Kato! oh god that accent)

The Green Hornet is probably the very first superhero movie where, during the duration of the movie, I can't help but wished the superhero would just die.

Seriously.

The Green Hornet made one fatal mistake regarding its main character. The movie does not give us, the audiences, any reason or chance whatsoever to ROOT or SYMPHATIZE or even CONNECT with him.

Let me put it simply. Britt Reid (played by Seth Rogen), the film's main character, the Green Hornet himself, is an unlikable prick without any redeeming quality whatsoever you can't help but feel pissed whenever he's on screen.

Let's compare it to, say, Tony Stark of Ironman. Tony is a jerk. He's a spoiled rich guy who loves to womanize and do whatever the hell he wants. Terrible choice for a main character, especially a superhero. But then he had a life-changing experience and realizes his own potential. He created the Ironman suit and try his best to do something to the world. He's still a witty attention seeker spoiled jerk, but that doesn't matter since the audience can now identify and connect with his motivation and background.

Britt Reid, on the other hand, is somewhat similar. His dad is a rich newspaper owner. He is a party animal and also a womanizer. When his dad died, he decided to be a superhero JUST FOR THE HECK OF IT. He decapitates his dad's memorial statue. He treat his partner, Kato, like a SLAVE. He made bad ridiculous decision in his 'superhero slash vigilante' persona. He severely insulted his partner's feeling many times and demand that the spotlight is on him exclusively.

In sort, Britt Reid, is completely unlikable. And I feel really unpleasant everytime he tries to do something on screen.

Yes, even in this movie, which attemps (and fail, cough) to satirize or making a parody out of the superhero genre.

That's right ladies and gentlemen. The Green Hornet oh-not-so-cleverly tries to satirize the superhero movie. This movie is about Britt Reid, the prick (described above), who tries to become a superhero (through not a solid motivation! screw you typical superhero movie!) by turning into the Green Hornet, the vigilante who beats the bad guy while telling the entire world that he's evil.

By the way, the name Green Hornet itself is invented through a ridiculous fashion, screw you typical superhero movie!

Christoph Waltz plays the main villain in this movie, Chudnofsky, some old guy with an identity crisis and tries to reinvent himself as a villain-with-persona in highly amusing way... screw you typical superhero movie! Unfortunately, I do feel Waltz is completely underused in this movie. Along with the main female, Lenore Case (Cameron Diaz).

I have to admit, the director, Michel Gondry (the one who made Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind) got the style. The action sequences and other camera effects are pretty entertaining at times. But I couldn't help but feel that the very first superhero movie in a year that's going to be full of superhero movies, is a dud.

4/10

#318 Love in Perth (201?)

2011-02-05T00:57:00.004+07:00

(Iya, ini filmnya si Gita Gutawa. Siapa tuh Gita Gutawa? Gw juga ga tau)

Ini film pertama yang gw tonton di bioskop tahun ini. Mungkin ada beberapa dari elo yang ngomel "kok pilihan film lo lucu" yah mau gimana lagi bro, Januari kemaren pilihan film dikit.

Udah pada tau sama yang namanya FTV? Bukan, bukan Fashion TV (itu mah favorit gw, apa lagi kalo lagi nayangin lingerie ato swimwear), tapi Film Televisi. Kalo ada yang istilah film "straight-to-dvd", FTV tuh "straight-to-television". Secara kualitas yah ngga beda jauh lah sama sinetron-sinetron kebanyakan.

Nah, Love in Perth ini lebih pantes jadi FTV di stasiun televisi lokal dibanding jadi film bioskop. Habis, dari semua aspek kecuali setting (Perth! Luar negeri! Banyak bule!), bener-bener nggak ada bedanya sama FTV yang biasa tayang sehari-hari.

Jalan ceritanya simpel. Gita Gutawa (jelas bukan nama karakter filnnya) pindah ke Perth buat sekolah. Di pesawat dia ketemu sama cowok gaul yang ngeselin banget (Derby Romero), sampe akhirnya dia sama cowok itu jadi punya status 'benci-benci sayang' selama mereka tinggal di Perth. LALU AKHIRNYA MEREKA JATUH CINTA. TAMAT.

Ada dua karakter sampingan di film ini yang perannya 'agak' menonjol. Pertama roommate-nya Gita yang always speak in english even though she's Indonesian, and she's like really evil and bullies Gita all the time and SHE THINKS PERTH DOESN'T HAVE QIBLAT like how cool is that huh huh huh?!

Yang kedua temennya Gita, cowok, gw lupa namanya siapa, pokoknya dia suka sama Gita gitu tapi ditolak. Ngga penting deh.

Satu aspek yang SANGAT merusak film ini adalah PRODUCT PLACEMENTnya yang keterlaluan. Hey, gw orangnya toleran sama product placement, apa lagi kalo niatnya dibawa kocak. Tapi film ini keterlaluan. Di awal-awal film, diliatin ada penumpang kabin pesawat MINUM NU GREEN TEA (sebut merek! yihaw!) padahal jelas-jelas cairan nggak boleh dibawa masuk sama penumpang ke dalem kabin! Gw nggak tau ini emang pembuat filmnya yang error ato ini sebuah sindiran terselubung ke bobroknya bandara internasional kesayangan kita.

Gw juga nggak ngerti, kenapa sih Perth? Spesialnya apa? Film ini nggak nunjukkin megah ato istimewanya Perth. Terakhir, CGI spesial di adegan tabrakan yang ada di film ini luar biasa konyolnya.

2/10

#317 The Best Animated Films of 2010 part 2

2011-01-31T22:43:00.002+07:00

THE BEST ANIMATED MOVIE I'VE SEEN IN A THEATER

TOY STORY 3

Yeah you can see this coming from a mile away. I like this movie. Hell, nearly EVERYONE like this movie. Finding someone who doesn't like Toy Story 3 is harder than finding a guy who wears a SM*SH underwear.

Coba liat. Kesuksesan Toy Story 3 secara komersial:

-Film animasi dengan pendapatan tertinggi sepanjang sejarah
-Film animasi pertama yang berhasil meraup lebih dari 1 milyar dolar di box office
-Film dengan pendapatan tertinggi di tahun 2010
-Film dengan pendapatan tertinggi kelima di dunia

Nggak hanya secara komersial, secara kritikal (?) juga:

-Film animasi ketiga dalam sejarah yang dinominasiin untuk Best Picture Oscar
-100% akan menang Best Animated Movie di Oscar nanti
-Best Reviewed Movie of the Year according to Rotten Tomatoes
-Film favorit Quentin Tarantino di tahun 2010

Wew. Tapi kalo mau agak fair, gw nggak ngeliat banyak kompetisi tahun ini. Tangled sama How to Train Your Dragon boleh lah dikategoriin jadi pesaing paling deket. Despicable Me lumayan. Megamind sama Alpha & Omega sucks lol. Belom nonton The Illusionist sama Legends of the Guardian sih...

But hey, here's the twist. Toy Story 3 is NOT the best animated movie of the year for me. That award goes in the next post. You may guess. Those who got the right answer will be given a free life-size Lotso doll :D

#316 The Best Animated Films of 2010 part 1

2011-01-30T23:07:00.007+07:00

Entry-entry berikutnya gw dedikasikan ke film-film animasi yang menurut gw paling keren sepanjang tahun 2010. Lanjut aja kita mulai ke yang pertama:

THE BEST ANIMATED SERIES OF 2010

DURARARA!!

(Durarara!! with two exclamation marks)

Take a good look at the title. "Durarara!!" What the hell does that even mean...? And yeah, those two exclamation marks are an official part of the title.

See, "Durarara!!" tells the story of an average boy named Mikado Ryugamine, who moves away from his rural home to Ikebukuro (Tokyo), in hope of finding a more exciting life.

That's the gist of it. Sounds BORING. Yeah yeah he moves away and find himself in the middle of a pretty anime-ish adventure, we get it! So let's get to the point, what kind of adventure is he having?

Well, it's the one that involves a headless bike-rider who's actually a Celtic Dullahan searching her head, an internet based organization called "Dollars", Russian mafia, a medical syndicate hellbent on kidnapping people for their experiment, a suicide club, a radical gang called the "Yellow Scarves", and a mysterious slasher who randomly attack people around town at night.

...

Quite an adventure.

Let's cut to the chase and go straight to my favorite part of the series: the characters. This anime features an amazing, absurd, and DYSFUNCTIONAL cast of characters, which includes:

-A headless horse-turned-bike rider who is actually a Dullahan of Celtic myth who works as a transporter and is also the main heroine of the series. Yes, she doesn't have a head, she's currently looking for it. And she's afraid of UFOs.

-A doctor who fell in love with the aforementioned HEADLESS woman/magical being. On a side note, he DISECTED HER ALIVE when he was still a boy. She survived. They are now living together. He wants to marry her. SHE DOESN'T HAVE A HEAD.

-A young man who fell in love with a HEAD IN A JAR (notice the connection?) and will do anything to protect his love, which includes smashing his own classmate's head to the wall until it breaks.

(the troublesome head in a jar)

-A young woman who fell deeply in love with her own biological younger brother (Hint: its the young man above) and is visibly JEALOUS WITH A HEAD IN A JAR. Some family there.

-A violent, short-tempered, ridiculously strong debt collector dressed as a bartender that can PUNCH PEOPLE OUT OF THEIR CLOTHES (one of my favorite). His hobby includes throwing vending machine at people and destroying street signs. Fun fact: he hates violence.

(best punch evar)

-An information broker who loves human so much he actually forced them to commit suicide. He also likes stepping on girl's cellphone... (another one of my favorite)

-A big black bulky Russian mob that works as a Sushi seller. Word has it the Sushi he sells are actually... human meat. Rumors.

-An otaku (that's a manga and anime addict for you) who casually spray people with gasoline and set them on fire. Oh he's also a torture specialist, somewhat.

...and many MANY more. See, those are the kinds of people our beloved main character got involved with. Quite an EXCITING life eh?

(she's headless for fuck's sake!)

Anyway, check this line from Wiki:

"The narrative [in this series] follows all of the characters equally, showing how their lives intersect, creating a greater plotline from what each character knows about a common incident."

The entire series span 24 episodes (plus 1 special episode), it aired from January to June last year. Like the above paragraph said, the series does not strictly follow a chronological line, it went back and forth through flashback or switches to another character's point of view. Each character has his/her own storyline and they collide with each other, creating the big picture.

I really dig that kind of storytelling :D

In addition of its freaky cast of characters and storytelling style, the soundtrack of this series is pretty good. My current cellphone ringtone is one of the track from the series, "The Sought-After Extraordinary". Lovely song.

I didn't watch many anime last year, but Durarara!! tops that list.

#315 Battle of D'Cost Part 2: Nasi Goreng Seafood

2011-01-29T14:26:00.000+07:00

Setahun sudah berlalu semenjak pertarungan besar di D'Cost Bandung yang memakan ribuan korban jiwa. Pertarungan epik yang disulut oleh sepiring Cumi Goreng Tepung yang menolak untuk disajikan itu kini sudah terlupakan oleh penduduk Bandung dan sekitarnya.

(untuk yang tidak ingat, bisa diliat Entry #239)

Sekarang, D'Cost Bandung sudah dibangun kembali. Para pengunjung setianya sudah bisa kembali menikmati hidangan seafood favorit mereka disana. Seisi bangunan, dari meja hingga dekorasi, sudah kembali seperti dulu lagi. Bahkan Sigap, salah satu korban dari pertempuran tahun lalu, sudah dibangkitkan kembali dari alam kubur untuk menyelesaikan skripsinya.

Cerita kita dimulai dengan segerombolan PENGANGGURAN SBM 2010 yang sedang menghabiskan waktu menganggur mereka dengan bermain futsal.

Selesai bermain, mereka yang kelaparan akhirnya memutuskan untuk makan di D'Cost, sebuah keputusan yang cukup mengejutkan mengingat mereka memiliki pengalaman LUAR BIASA BURUK di tempat tersebut, terlebih lagi mereka datang bersama Nicky, salah satu biang perang tahun lalu.

Dari awal mereka duduk, pertanda-pertanda buruk mulai terlihat. TAK SATU PUN pelayan ingin melayani mereka! Mereka harus menjerit untuk diberikan menu! Itu juga mereka hanya diberi 4 lembar menu, padahal mereka ber-13.

Tapi akhirnya mereka bisa makan dengan nyaman... sampai akhirnya tragedi dimulai. Nasi Goreng Seafood yang dipesan tidak kunjung datang... padahal ada 5 orang yang memesan makanan tersebut, dan salah satu dari 5 orang itu adalah GEDE LILA.

Gede yang memiliki julukan "Si Ganas dari Bali", kehilangan kesabaran dan memanggil pelayan terdekat.

"Mas! Nasi Goreng Seafood saya kok belom dateng?! Itu temen-temen saya makanannya udah pada selesai makan!"

"Wah saya nggak tau mas."

"GIMANA SIH?!"

"Mas jangan teriak-teriak gitu dong sama saya. Saya kan cuma pelayan."

"ANJING! LO TAU NGGAK, GW INI FANSNYA BALI DEVATA!"

"LHA TERUS KENAPA?! GW GA PEDULI...!"

"BANGSAAAAAAAAT!!!"

Gede pun kehilangan kendali atas emosinya. Otot-ototnya membengkak dan kulitnya berubah menjadi warna hijau. Dengan satu tangan ia angkat si pelayan lancang dan ia lempar ke ujung ruangan, mengakibatkan badannya hancur remuk redam.

Spontan para pengunjung yang sedang makan berteriak histeris dan langsung melarikan diri ke luar. Tapi kubu D'Cost kali ini sudah siap. Mereka langsung mengambil langkah cepat dengan memanggil semua koki hingga tukang supir untuk mengeroyok kubu SBM.

Tapi jangan salah, kubu SBM juga sudah siap! Dengan Gede dan William "Polar" Suryanto di garis depan, tim SBM berhasil menghalau lemparan-lemparan Tauge Ikan Asin yang dilemparkan ke arah mereka, sekaligus menggunakan bakul-bakul nasi kosong untuk memecahkan kepala-kepala musuh mereka.

Sayang korban jiwa kembali jatuh. Lagi-lagi Sigap harus kehilangan nyawanya ketika salah satu Kepiting Lada Hitam menancap di jantungnya. Diwa, saudara Sigap, menangis dan meraung-raung meratapinya, sebelum ia sendiri meloncat penuh dengan emosi ke arah para pelayan D'Cost dan kehilangan nyawanya akibat tertimbun Kerang Bambu Saus Tiram yang luar biasa lezatnya.

Keadaan mulai tampak buruk untuk tim SBM yang makin tertekan, sampai Nicky yang sudah menduga bahwa ini semua akan terjadi mengeluarkan senjata rahasianya dari balik sakunya. Sebuah GRANAT.

Ia melemparkan granat tersebut dan ledakannya menghancurkan seisi D'Cost beserta pelayan-pelayannya. Tim SBM akhirnya berhasil menang. Ditemani kobaran api D'Cost di belakang, mereka berjalan pulang untuk menghadapi masa depan mereka yang dipenuhi dengan kabut pengangguran.

what the fuck huh

#314 The Official Oscar Nomination 2011

2011-01-25T23:31:00.003+07:00

Muahahahah. Nominasi resminya udah nongol. Gw nggak mau ngepost semuanya, cuma beberapa doang (lagian sisanya bisa dicek sendiri di situs2 laen), sekalian ngecek sama prediksi gw tadi, plus ada tambahan-tambahan komen dari gw.

BEST PICTURE
“Black Swan”
“The Fighter”
“Inception”
“The Kids Are All Right”
“The King's Speech”
“127 Hours”
“The Social Network”
“Toy Story 3”
“True Grit”
“Winter's Bone"

Prediksi gw bener semua. Dan gw nggak suka. Habis itu berarti The Town gagal dapet nominasi. Ugh. Gw ngga terlalu suka Winter's Bone... dari semua film diatas yang gw belom tonton: The Fighter, The King's Speech, True Grit, sama The Kids Are All Right (khusus yang satu ini gw bener-bener ga tertarik, padahal DVD bajakannya udah dapet dari lama).

BEST DIRECTOR
Darren Aronofsky - Black Swan
David O. Russell - The Fighter
Tom Hooper - The King's Speech
David Fincher - The Social Network
Joel Coen and Ethan Coen - True Grit

So it's the Coen Bros over Nolan. Meh. Gw nggak terlalu shock ato kecewa (unlike those Nolan fanboy making commotion on Twitter). Soalnya gw belom nonton True Grit, udah gitu gw secara pribadi ngerasa Danny Boyle lebih pantes dibanding Nolan.

dan untuk mengutip kata-kata fans Nolan nomor satu di SBM, tuan BrianYW: "bodo ah, bagus malah, biar dia ga cepet puas", thumbs up for Brian

BEST ACTOR
Javier Bardem - Biutiful
Jeff Bridges - True Grit
Jesse Eisenberg - The Social Network
Colin Firth -The King's Speech
James Franco - 127 Hours

I completely forgot about Javier Bardem, he won Best Actor in last year's Cannes, and I really REALLY need to watch True Grit... padahal tuh film udah masuk salah satu Most Anticipated Film of the Year gw tahun lalu... (Entry #245). Poor Marky Mark btw ;_;

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
Christian Bale - The Fighter
John Hawkes - Winter's Bone
Jeremy Renner - The Town
Mark Ruffalo - The Kids Are All Right
Geoffrey Rush - The King's Speech

Yang salah dari prediksi gw: Andrew Garfield sama Matt Damon (asal tebak, blom nonton True Grit lol) ngga masuk, yang masuk John Hawkes (Winter's Bone, hhh mendingan Andrew IMO) sama Mark Ruffalo. Bodo, yang penting Jeremy Renner masuk.

BEST ACTRESS
Annette Bening - The Kids Are All Right
Nicole Kidman - Rabbit Hole
Jennifer Lawrence - Winter's Bone
Natalie Portman - Black Swan
Michelle Williams - Blue Valentine

Tuh kan Hailee masuknya Best Supporting Actress, hahahah. Gw sendiri baru nonton 2 dari 5 film diatas hhh, tapi gw baru dapet Blue Valentine seh, nanti nonton ah. Katanya ada Michelle Williams full frontal scene gitu ahahah nikmat.

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Amy Adams - The Fighter
Helena Bonham Carter - The King's Speech
Melissa Leo - The Fighter
Hailee Steinfeld - True Grit
Jacki Weaver - Animal Kingdom

Wut, no Mila Kunis? Fine. No complaints on the rest.

Buat best Adapted Screenplay... gw sedih The Town nggak masuk. Hiks. Gw seneng ama tuh film.

Entar gw bikin ah postingan prediksi buat siapa yang menang etc etc, sekalian sama film-film favorit gw tahun lalu.

#313 Oscar 2011 Nomination Prediction

2011-01-25T12:19:00.003+07:00

We only have a couple of hours left, go go go!

(will only be doing the major awards)

BEST PICTURE:

The Social Network
The King's Speech
127 Hours
Toy Story 3
Inception
The Fighter
Black Swan
True Grit
The Kids Are All Right
Winter's Bone

though I really hope The Town got a surprise spot over Winter's Bone or The Kids Are All Right. Blue Valentine also got a chance.

BEST DIRECTOR:
David Fincher - The Social Network
Tom Hooper - The King's Speech
Darren Aronofsky - Black Swan
David O' Russel - The Fighter
This last spot is a fight between Chris Nolan, Danny Boyle, and the Coens, though Nolan should get it.

BEST ACTOR:
Colin Firth - The King's Speech
Jesse Eisenberg - The Social Network
Mark Wahlberg - The Fighter
James Franco - 127 Hours
not sure for this other one...

BEST ACTRESS:
Natalie Portman - Black Swan
Michelle Williams - Blue Valentine
Jennifer Lawrence - Winter's Bone
Annette Benning - The Kids Are All Right
Hailee Stanfield - True Grit (not really sure 'bout this one, could be Best Supporting Actress)

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR:
Jeremy Renner - The Town ---> My Personal Favorite
Christian Bale - The Fighter
Matt Damon - True Grit
Andrew Garfield - The Social Network
Geoffrey Rush - The King's Speech

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS:
Mila Kunis - Black Swan
Melissa Leo - The Fighter
Helena Bonham Carter - The King's Speech
Jackie Weaver - Animal Kingdom
Amy Adams - The Fighter

this needs to be cut short, will be continued if possible

#312 Going Back to the Cinemas

2011-01-25T00:21:00.000+07:00

Gw suka film. Dah lama gw nggak nulis tentang film. Jadi sekarang gw nulis tentang film.

Banyak film-film 2010 yang udah gw tonton tapi belom gw tulis. Kita bilang aja gara-gara gw sibuk... ato males, terserah. Yang jelas, sekarang gw bakal ngebahas (secara super singkat) film-film 2010 yang gw tonton di bioskop tapi ngga sempet gw bahas.

The Last Airbender [2/10]
Busuk. Salah satu kandidat terkuat Razzie. Kelamaan joget, ceritanya loncat kemana-mana, udah gitu berantemnya nggak pake logika.

The Expendables [6/10]
Fun, but that's about it really. Could've been more, SHOULD've been more.

Shock Labyrinth Extreme 3D [1/10]
Ini film Jepang gw tonton cuma gara-gara kepaksa. Ancur. Pembuat filmnya nggak pengen nyeritain sebuah cerita, mereka cuma pengen ngebikin penonton bingung.

The Social Network [9+/10]
My 2nd favorite movie of the year so far. Brilliant writing, directing, acting, and music all around. Harapan gw buat menang Best Picture.

Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps [5/10]
Biasa. A really, really average drama.

Sang Pencerah [8/10]
AKA film yang seharusnya menang FFI. The setting, production, and Lukman Sardi's performance alone should nab the award.

Megamind [5/10]
Standar komedi Dreamworks yang nggak lucu grr... Marlon Brando references in a kids movie oh ha ha ha.

Rapunzel (or Tangled, whatever) [8.5/10]
Iye, gw nonton film ini di bioskop. Berdua. Sama adek gw. Dikelilingi anak-anak cilik. Bagus kok. Mendingan ini kemana-mana dari pada Megamind.

Satu Jam Saja [3/10]
Mungkin gw aja tapi kayaknya Rano Karno udah ngga bisa nulis dialog antar remaja -_-, slow movie is slooow.

Madame X [1/10]
Hmm... ini mungkin film paling gw ngga suka sepanjang tahun... ga tau yang mau dinikmatin apaan; lucu kaga, dramatis kaga, seru juga kaga... Joko Anwar ;_; kasian

Sweetheart [4/10]
Film lokal. Dengan jalan cerita dan akting yang super standar tapi entah kenapa masih bisa gw nikmatin. Dikit. Mungkin karena lebay.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 [9/10]
Wow, film Harry Potter jadi salah satu film favorit gw di tahun ini o_O, gw sendiri ngga nyangka.

Unstoppable [7/10]
As a movie about a train that can't stop, it accomplishes it's mission well.

moga-moga ga ada yang kelewatan hhh

Nominasi-nominasi Oscar bakal diumumin tanggal 25. Hmm. Ngga terlalu perlu juga bikin prediksi-prediksi tapi kayaknya ngga lengkap, tar gw bikin de.

#311 Cyanide & Happiness

2011-01-21T22:43:00.002+07:00

I bought their first book last month. :D

love it

(taken directly from their homepage, explosm.net)

hmmm feel like making some movie related posts this weekend

#310 Author Existence Failure

2011-01-19T17:58:00.001+07:00

The last couple of months have been rough for me. Yes. Not only in terms of blogging, but for everything else.

After wrapping up college in October, I'm finally a graduate. A fresh, young, innocent bachelor ready to face the world... and facing countless interviews in hope to land a job.

Thanks to SBM's effort in distributing my CVs, I got calls and texts from companies offering me a job. Which I mostly ignored. Blame it on my lack of interest or whatever, I only responded in three of them. By responding, I mean I actually did attend the test and interview.

Two out of those three went pretty well, but I pulled out in the end. As in, I managed to go to the final phase of the recruitment (not counting the medcheck though) but I declined to show up to the appointment. As for the other one, I failed on the very first interview. Hint: The interview uses english.

I can't really explain why I decided to pull out on those two companies since I can't really elaborate without spilling their names (and I really don't want to), so let's just say that... I'm not really interested with the job position that they have decided upon me.

But hey, come on, getting a job isn't everything! I could do something else like, y'know, starting my own business! With my fellow graduate friends! It'll be really fun! Alright... what business would be logical for me and my friends to start?

Let's see... I could start a game center, restaurant, game center, a small street-side restaurant, game center, and game center. Okay, there weren't plenty of alternatives... so I'd rather shelf my plan for the time being.

But you know what, screw both of them! I could pursue a HIGHER EDUCATION you know! I'm still young, 21 years of age! I shouldn't be wasting my time with mundane job huntings and silly business ideas! Master degree, here I come!

...

where to?

Fun Fact: Gw bukan pengangguran. Gw nggak pernah jadi pengangguran.

#309 Resurrected Replayer

2011-01-17T21:32:00.003+07:00

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack.

Yeah.

For the sake of a better front page (I knew people were bored to death from those Oddisey posts on the front page, assuming there are still people that went here), I decided to end my blogging hiatus.

Yes, I was on a hiatus. I never announced it, but a two months spell without any posts should give it away. I'm not in mood to explain the reason behind my lack of posts right now, so maybe sometime in the future.

In the meantime, let's talk about my previous posting plan which nobody cares. Sydney trip, the new Singapore trip, and plenty of movie posts are OFFICIALLY DISCARDED. Unless I decided to change my mind. Which I usually did. In a whim. Inconsistency ftw. I have plans for future posts already. Let's just hope I can work my ass off and put them into fruition.

#308 Oddisey 2010 part 6: Mosambas

2010-10-05T16:29:00.007+07:00

Alright, this'll be brief.

Gw nggak bisa komen banyak soal show terakhir ini. Waktu ditayangin gw udah kerasa capek dan nggak bisa sefokus itu nontonnya. Jadinya sekarang gw hampir nggak inget detail-detail shownya (bawaannya sama kayak show Fantasi dari Oddisey tahun lalu). Nggak jelek kok, tapi nggak spesial juga.

Yang gw inget malah TUDUHAN PLAGIAT kocak dari beberapa anak angkatan gw yang dulu main di drama di tema yang sama, Fantasi. Hahahah. Gw nggak termasuk jadi gw nggak terlalu ngerti. Lucu ajah.

Dah ah.

Score: **

#307 Oddisey 2010 part 5: Bangun(,)Indonesia

2010-09-27T18:26:00.009+07:00

Sorry for the delay, I caught a small fever last week and had some really important stuff to do (read: Dota tourney).

Sekarang kita masuk ke show berikutnya, show dengan tema Mix and Match. Mmm, Mix and Match. Gw inget punya pengalaman buruk sama show dengan tema serupa tahun lalu. Lebih baik nggak usah dibahas lagi deh. Tapi yang jelas gw jadi sedikit waswas sebelum nonton show ini.

One thing for sure, up until this very moment, I still have no idea what the fuck does Mix and Match means, and I'm too lazy to google it up. But eh, who gives a fuck right?

In contrast from the previous show's artistic approach, this show is all about raw energy and enthusiasm. It shows plenty of fun and energetic dance and music sequences all while trying to convey its theme of NATIONALISM (gasp! what a surprise!). The result is a very entertaining show capable of uplifting the audience.

Yup, show ini simpel, tapi dikemas dengan apik dan asyik. Inti ceritanya simpel. Ada sekelompok orang yang merepresentasikan pemerintahan pergi untuk melihat kondisi rakyat sekitar, yang berujung kepada mereka memahami perbedaan dan memutuskan untuk bersinergi dengan mereka. Hasilnya adalah sebuah pesan terselubung dengan tujuan yang kayaknya nggak perlu diungkapkan lagi.

Bagian paling spesial dari show ini ada di ensembel perkusi di tengah acara, dan mungkin bagian ini adalah suguhan utama di show ini. Ensemble perkusi ini menggunakan instrumen yang (kebanyakan) nggak lebih dari alat-alat simpel, tapi menyajikan musik dan koreo yang sangat menyenangkan dan enak untuk dinikmati.

Bahkan ada momen yang bener-bener bikin gw salut, yaitu bagian dimana mereka berinteraksi dengan para penonton dan mengajak mereka untuk bertepuk tangan bersama-sama. Harus gw akui, interaksi tersebut cukup sukses dan membuat show ini menjadi one of a kind di sejarah Oddisey. (based on my experience anyway)

Selain perkusi, mereka juga menyuguhkan dance robot modern yang... gw ngga terlalu nangkep konteksnya dengan alur cerita, tapi asyik banget buat ditonton.

Oh iya, voting di penghujung acara menobatkan show ini sebagai Best Show Oddisey 2010, dan gw setuju. Gw pribadi juga milih show ini sebagai show terbaik malam itu. Yah emang pilihannya ketat di antara show ini sama show sebelumnya, tapi show ini mengungguli tipis.

Score: ****

#306 Oddisey 2010 part 4: Memory Over Moment

2010-09-25T22:59:00.006+07:00

Beberapa hari sebelum Oddisey 2010 dimulai, gw udah ngeliat-liat poster show-shownya di Facebook. Dari semua poster yang ada, poster yang palng menarik perhatian gw tuh yang ini. Gw suka banget sama taglinenya. Enggak, gw bukannya sentimen terus tersentuh ato apa, gw cuma merhatiin penggunaan bahasa inggris sama pemilihan kata-katanya. Bagus. Berdasarkan pengamatan gw yang kritis, jenius, dan keren, itu tanda-tanda awal kalo ada sesuatu yang bagus.

Selain itu, BRIAN YW, bos besar SBM ITB, sempet nyerocos ke gw tentang show bertema Romance ini. Waktu UAS kemaren, dia sempet nonton show ini dan menurut dia shownya keren banget. Terus dia juga bilang kalo sutradaranya jenius. Uwah! Gokil! Gw nggak punya alasan untuk nggak percaya sama Brian YW. Brian YW ini seleranya cukup teruji. Dia salah satu anggota paling eksis di LFM (klub filmnya ITB) dan penggemar berat Christopher Nolan. Udah gitu dia juga mantan Kahim SBM! Mantap.

Eeeh tapi begitu gw inget-inget Brian YW ini ketiduran pas nonton Inception, dan beberapa temen gw percaya kalo Brian YW ini anaknya skip (sori buat yang nggak ngerti, jargon anak gaul). Haduh, pusing gw. Ya udah la, seperti biasa gw netralkan ekspektasi gw, tapi gw tumbuhkan antisipasi gw.

...

Well, whaddya know.

I wouldn't go as far as calling it genius, but this show sure display a stunning work of brilliance. It combines an intricate storytelling and a willingness to step out of the edge, resulting in a densely crafted show with a delicate twist in the end.

Here's the general outline of the show:

It begins with a video of a guy telling the audience that he suffers from depression. Right after that, the show is divided into 4 'seemingly unrelated' segments.

Segmen pertama nyeritain tentang seseorang yang dijatuhin hukuman mati gara-gara dituduh ngebunuh adeknya sendiri. Segmen kedua tentang seorang detektif yang jatuh cinta sama... seorang malaikat pencabut nyawa. Segmen ketiga tentang sebuah hubungan cinta yang kandas akibat perbedaan agama. Segmen terakhir nyeritain tentang seorang pembuat boneka yang jatuh cinta sama... boneka ciptaannya sendiri.

(at least, those are what I seem to remember... if there are any mistakes feel free to tell me)

Semua cerita segmen itu 'berakhir' dengan munculnya seorang pria misterius dengan wajah terbalut perban yang mengambil sesuatu dari tokoh pria utama di segmen tersebut (tiap segmen aktor pria utamanya berbeda-beda). Sepanjang show penonton cuma bisa menebak-nebak kosong akan penjelasan dari plot show ini, dan tentunya penjelasan tersebut baru muncul di penghujung shownya. Mindfuck lol.

Tapi show yang satu ini nggak hanya soal ceritanya. Musik sama dance-dancenya keren-keren huy.

Contoh musik yang digunakan (ini trailer shownya btw): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CyroBPqwt6k

Let's see... the second segment has one of the most graceful dance in the entire night. The third segment has LIVE SAXOPHONE PLAYING FUCKING KENNY G! (yeah it's not perfect but fuck it, it's still AWESOME). The last segment has what I would say the CREEPIEST dance ever shown in the history of Oddisey. I mean it, it's so bizarre and creepy it did scare some of us a little bit. All of them makes up for a very entertaining performance.

Oh ya, mungkin gwnya aja yang skip, tapi kayaknya gw nggak ngeliat ada unsur nasionalisme yang jadi tema Oddisey 2010 di show ini... which is not a bad thing though. I fucking hate it when one of those dull uncreative nationalism crap triumphs over something better.

That's it I guess. Great show.

Score: ****

#305 It's A Half Time Break Ladies and Gentlemen!

2010-09-19T21:34:00.002+07:00

Sama kayak tahun lalu, postingan mengenai Oddisey harus ditunda dulu...

Alasannya sama juga sama kayak tahun lalu, gw mau cabut ke... Singapur.

LAGI

YOI

SINGAPUR LAGE

GW DAH KAYAK ANAK BORJU GITU KAN, NONGKRONG DI SINGAPUR MULU

HIDUP INI EMANG NIKMAT, HAHAHAH

...

Pokoknya gitu dah. Gw masih ada urusan yang belom selesai ama sebuah jeans biadab... Yes, we have unfinished business. I and he. ("He and me...!") DON'T YOU TALK TO ME ABOUT GRAMMAR...! (long live vague references)

Gw berangkat ke Singapur besok Senin. Pulang hari Jumat. Postingan Oddisey bakal dilanjutin habis gw pulang dari Singapur... habis itu gw baru ngepost tentang perjalanan gw di Singapur, yang tentunya bakal seru dan semenarik film The Last Airbender.

bye

#304 Oddisey 2010 part 3: Operan van Jaka

2010-09-17T21:23:00.005+07:00

...

...

...

...

...

I can't do it

Score: *

#303 Oddisey 2010 part 2: Karma Cinta Adam dan Hawa Dalam Enigma

2010-09-17T19:56:00.005+07:00

Show pertama di Oddisey 2010 bertema Body Performance. Judulnya panjang-panjang gitu dah. Tuh gw kasi gambar kutipan cerita dari bookletnya, tapi kalo di mata gw sih ceritanya kurang lebih begini:

PLOT:
Once upon a time, in heaven, lives Adam and Eve who were VERY BORED because they had nothing to do besides fucking each other. One day, Adam ate the forbidden fruit and get casted away from heaven. He fell to earth and become the KING OF SRIWIJAYA KINGDOM. And then he went to Egypt! Dances to the song of Slumdog Millionaire! And then he uuuh I kinda lost track on what the heck is happening -_-

Maybe some of you will think "What the fuck is going on?" when you read that, and believe me, that is the same exact thing I had in my mind when I was watching the show. The whole thing just doesn't make any sense. But then I remembered the title of the show... Karma Cinta blablabla Dalam ENIGMA. Enigma. Aaah. That explains... somehow... but that still doesn't explain why they did the Jai Ho dance in Egypt.

Untuk jalan cerita, gw telen aja bulet-bulet dibantu dengan kata Enigma, habis keliatannya emang sengaja dibikin begitu. Yang jelas, keistimewaan show pertama ini ada di dance-dancenya (namanya juga Body Performance, hurr) dan 'inovasi-inovasi' yang mereka gunakan.

(Inovasi... gw nyebutnya inovasi habis gw nggak tau lagi mau nyebutnya apaan)

Di pembuka show, mereka ngebentangin layar yang diberdiriin di atas panggung. Adam dan Hawanya berakting di belakang layar tanpa suara, jadi cuma keliatan siluetnya gitu. Ini adegan favorit gw di show ini. Keren. Tarian sama gerakannya kerasa lebih menggigit padahal cuma keliatan siluetnya doang, trus body si hawanya juga menggugah selera uahahahah. Gw sempet ngira seluruh show bakal dilakukan pake metode ini, hahah. Kalo iya mantep sih, bener-bener full body performance.

Terus mereka juga make... uuh... apa tuh, UV? Yang glow in the dark gitu dah... AKH GW NGGA TAU NAMANYA! Pokoknya gitu dah... satu teater lampunya digelapin trus peralatan yang mereka gunain keliatan nyala-nyala gitu... gw sih nggak sebegitu terkesannya sama adegannya, habis kerasa agak kelamaan, tapi kreatifitas dan inovatifnya layak dipuji.

Sisa shownya penuh dengan beragam tarian, dari Jai Ho yang gw tulis dari awal sampe tarian yang terinspirasi dari tari Kecak Bali. Lumayan lah.

Yang jelas, gw bisa ngeliat kalo ada orang yang ngomel tentang alur cerita shownya, tapi mo gimana juga show yang satu ini cukup menghibur. Tapi yang paling penting, show ini berhasil menjalankan perannya sebagai show pembuka Oddisey 2010 dengan sangat baik dan memberikan ekspektasi positif kepada para penonton, terlebih setelah opening actnya yang, sori, menurut gw nggak menarik dan keliatan kayak festival kebudayaan yang biasa kita liat di luar sana.

Score: ***

#302 Oddisey 2010 part 1: Introduction or Whatever

2010-09-16T20:42:00.007+07:00

Beberapa minggu sebelum Oddisey 2010, ada temen gw nanya dengan polos.

"Lo Oddisey besok nonton kan? Lo bakal bikin tulisan lagi nggak di blog lo?"

"Kagak ah. Udah kapok gw. Nggak lagi dah." jawab gw.

"Yah, tapi kalo gitu kan nggak adil dong."

Shit. Bener juga dia. Muncul deh tekad gw buat bikin tulisan tentang Oddisey tahun ini. Tapi kali ini, gw berusaha buat nggak ngulang kesalahan gw tahun lalu dengan menjaga pilihan kata-kata gw.

Karena itu, apa bila ada anak-anak SBM 2012, sebelumnya gw melayangkan permintaan maaf sebesar-besarnya kalo ada tulisan gw yang menyinggung perasaan. Semua yang gw tulis itu murni perasaan gw dengan jujur, tapi gw juga akan berusaha untuk tidak menggunakan kata-kata yang menyerang secara langsung atau kasar (mungkin banyak kata-kata eksplisit macam fuck tapi penggunaannya bukan untuk flaming, plis abis deh yang nggak bisa ngebedain -_-).

Buat penilaian sendiri, sama kayak yang dulu, gw bakal ngasi bintang. Nilai maksimum 4 bintang.

Mungkin ini semua agak telat, tapi ya udah lah ya, gw udah ngasi tau jauh hari kalo bakal gw tunda. Btw, gw nggak ada gambar-gambar posternya neh. Entah kenapa gw nggak bisa nemu facebooknya. Cacat. Kayaknya nggak bakal ada gambar poster-posternya, harap dimaklumi.

EDIT: Ooops, situs Oddiseynya ketemu! Dapet deh gambar-gambar posternya... semua gambar Oddisey 2010 yang gw pake di blog ini dicuri tanpa belas kasihan dari www.oddiseysbm.com

Intro singkat buat mereka yang nggak tidak tahu menahu:

Oddisey itu acara drama yang diselenggarain kampus gw. Penyelenggaranya ya anak-anak tingkat satu di SBM. Tujuannya (katanya sih) buat ngelatih soft skill sama ngasi pengalaman manajemen. Bakal ada 5 (dulu 4) grup berbeda yang ngebawain show mereka dengan tema masing-masing.

Dulu, tepatnya 2 tahun lalu, gw juga ikut berpartisipasi di Oddisey yang diselenggarain angkatan gw. Dan tahun lalu, gw bikin postingan tentang Oddisey angkatan bawah yang dikategorikan kontroversial oleh beberapa pihak... bukan sesuatu yang gw banggain <_<

Jadi, yah, gitu, mulai besok gw bakal mulai ngepost, err, 'review' gw ke tiap show di Oddisey 2010. Ada 5 show, dan gw nggak mau nebas semuanya sekaligus.

#301 Post-Graduation Movie Round-Ups

2010-09-14T21:08:00.003+07:00

Just some brief post about my movie life in general. Heh.

Movie posts on hold:
The Sorcerer's Apprentice, The Last Airbender, and The Expendables. I'll try to sort them out this week, ugh.

Current movie anticipation:
Let's see... there are still three movies left in my 2010 anticipation list: Tree of Life, True Grit, and London Boulevard. Other movies I'm interested includes Black Swan, Let Me In, Machete, and Harry Potter 7.

Also interested in The Social Network. Yeah, the so-called Facebook movie. I heard it's 3 hours long so... should be fun lol.

Currently more pumped for Catfish. The trailer looks awesome. Go check it out on Youtube, and try your best NOT to read a single comment in there. It doesn't look like I could watch it in a local cinema though, and there is a very slim chance that I could find the DVD, so... ugh.

Movies I don't give a fuck:
That new Resident Evil movie. Fuck that shit.
Eat Pray Love. Julia Roberts having a vacation in Bali? No thanks.
Wall Street 2. It's probably going to be good but I don't know, currently I couldn't care less for this movie.
Jackass 3D. Har har.
Saw 3D. See above.
That new Chronicles of Narnia film. Never a fan, haven't watched a single movie in the series.

Some random award thoughts:
Is it just me or James Franco is a lock for an Oscar nomination in Danny Boyle's 127 Hours? Haven't watched it yet but it's about Aron Ralston for fuck's sake, he's like, one of the manliest person that have ever lived and I've been a fan of him since middle school. I doubt you ever heard of him though.

There are some buzz that Natalie Portman might get an Oscar nod for her performance in Black Swan. Interesting. I'm more interested in her lesbian scene though.

Sofia Coppola's new movie "Somewhere" won the Golden Lion in this year's Venice International Film Festival (that's like, the chosen best film for you uneducated ones). I'll check it out when I got the chance.

Leftover movie rant:
It sucks that Scott Pilgrim flopped... I LOVE the comic book >_> I blame Michael Cera for this.

That's it I guess. Catfish where are you...?

#300 Entry 300

2010-09-13T22:02:00.003+07:00

Di postingan ke 300 ini, untuk kalian semua yang merayakan, Semuawarnakecualihitam mengucapkan

RAFFI AHMAD
TIKA PUTRI
SELAMAT IDUL FITRI

Bagi kalian yang tidak, terima kasih banyak atas toleransinya selama bulan puasa.

(telat? woy, lo nggak pernah denger istilah better late than never?)

#299 Salt (2010)

2010-09-12T22:49:00.002+07:00

(Angelina Jolie dipermak pake photoshop buat poster film ini, menyedihkan)

Gw KETIDURAN waktu nonton film ini.

Nggak nggak nggak, bukan sepenuhnya gara-gara filmnya, waktu itu gwnya aja bener-bener kurang tidur. Ada kali hampir 2 hari gw nggak tidur. Gw lupa gara-gara apaan... kayaknya ngerjain TA sama bolak balik ke kampus deh.

Gile, kapan yah terakhir kali gw tidur di bioskop? Mmm... kalo gw inget-inget kayaknya sebelum gw masuk kuliah de, waktu itu nonton film judulnya Juncture kalo nggak salah. Midnight. Masih SMA, belom terbiasa. Tidur deh.

Pokoknya jarang deh gw ketiduran di bioskop. Kalo pun ketiduran, itu pun paling karna gwnya yang capek ato ngantuk, bukan karena filmnya. Kalo gw pikir-pikir, kayaknya gw nggak pernah ketiduran di bioskop gara-gara filmnya ancur. Seinget gw yah.

Jadi yah itu, gw nggak bisa ngasi nilai ke film ini. Gw ketiduran waktu film udah jalan sekitar 20 menitan, dan baru kebangun di 20 menit terakhir. Wew. Serius, 20 menit terakhir. Tidur gw pules banget. Tiba-tiba si Angelina Jolie rambutnya udah brubah warna dan temennya berkhianat. Pusing gw. Rugi tiket nggak tuh wkwk.

Tapi gw udah nggak terlalu suka filmnya dari 20 menit pertama yang gw liat, dan 20 menit terakhirnya malah menurut gw agak cacat. Jadi kayaknya gw nggak serugi itu.

#298 The Invasion of RADIOACTIVE BOARS

2010-09-07T19:30:00.005+07:00

I wrote about invasions in the previous post. Now check this news about how a legion of RADIOACTIVE BOARS INVADED a football match in German:

Local officials said on Friday that wild boar had entered Dresden Borea's Jaegerpark (Hunter Park) stadium overnight, derailing Saturday's kickoff against Lokomotive Leipzig.

The boars left such big holes in the playing surface as they scavenged for food that there is no way the match in German's fifth tier could be played.

Apparently Germany's boar problem goes far beyond ruining fifth division matches. Their heightened breeding rate has resulted in a massive boar population that is "destroying crops, killing pets and even attacking people," according to Reuters. Plus, some of them are even RADIOACTIVE. Yes, RADIOACTIVE BOARS are on the loose. Fear will not help you when the wild, radioactive boars attack.

Gile. Bayangin kalo invasinya terjadi waktu pertandingan berjalan. Coba, lo lagi maen bola asyik-asyik tiba tiba muncul SERIBU DUA RATUS BABI HUTAN RADIOAKTIF ngobrak-ngabrik lapangan buat nyari makan. Rumput lapangan, DIMAKAN. Bola yang lagi lo dribble, DIMAKAN. Gawang diserudukin ampe roboh, DIMAKAN. Wasit yang baru ngasi kartu merah ke temen lo, DIMAKAN.

Yang begini ini yang gw maksud. Invasi BABI HUTAN. BABI HUTAN RADIOAKTIF. Kapan sih peristiwa seru macam begini terjadi di deket gw?! Hrhrhrhhhhrhh.

Babinya radioaktif lagi. Gw nggak ngerti kemampuan spesial apa yang dimiliki babi-babi radioaktif, tapi kalo gw asumsiin sih kekuatan fisik mereka jauh lebih tinggi dari babi hutan biasa dan bisa ngeluarin laser dari mata mereka. Ukuran babi-babi tersebut mungkin segini:

(orang di foto ini adalah satu-satunya yang selamat dari tim yang terdiri dari 47 pemburu profesional)

Kalo babi-babi yang masih bayinya mungkin segini:

(orang yang dikanan sedang berusaha menyelamatkan dirinya dengan meminum obat batuk)

I'm still looking for the picture where the boars shoot laser beam out of their eyes.

#297 Black Block Black Block Black

2010-09-06T22:15:00.003+07:00

Status: Stumped.

Can't really write anything.

Besides some pending movie posts (which I grew very tired of), there's just nothing to write about. It's either my life grew more boring than usual (I finished college, come on), or there are just too many happenings going on I can't point a topic to write about. I guess it's the former though.

In summary, things got pretty boring.

Yea, I know, I need to bear with it. But come on, is it too much to ask for something awesome to happen? Like, you know, something along the lines of alien invasion. Or zombie invasion. Or, heck, mutant two-headed alligator invasion, whatever. Those seemed plausible, right?

At least I could write something then. Maybe about how me and my friends survive the invasion and kicking the aliens' asses while shagging chicks along the way. At least that would make a better story than a guy sitting on the couch all day long marathoning Entourage and High School of the Dead.

Now that I think about it, perhaps this is a good time for me to write a fiction...

#296 Inception (2010)

2010-08-31T22:03:00.004+07:00

(ohohoho)

Temen gw Jatun ketiduran DUA KALI pas nonton film ini.

Si Jatun ini duduk di sebelah gw persis. Waktu film baru main sekitar setengah jam, gw sendiri nggak ngerti kenapa tapi gw ngerasa perlu buat nengok ke samping. Pas gw nengok, eaaaa, Jatun tidur. Tidurnya yang sok-sok diumpetin gitu, kepalanya ditekuk ke bawah kayak lagi mikir. Mungkin dia malu. Tapi beberapa menit kemudian dia bangun.

Terus pas film udah masuk setengah jam terakhir, lagi-lagi gw punya firasat lucu buat nengok ke arah Jatun, walaupun gw udah fokus total ke layar. Waktu gw tengok... Jatun udah tidur lagi. Kali ini tidurnya nggak pake jaim, kepalanya jatoh ke samping, mulutnya kebuka lebar, lengkap dengan sedikit dengkuran. Udah kayak mati keracunan gitu. Beberapa menit kemudian dia kebangun (lagi), dan gw bisa denger dia nyeletuk "Anjing, gw ketiduran lagi!".

Cukup soal Jatun. Ayo kita bahas filmnya, siapa tahu kita bisa mencari tahu apa yang membuat Jatun ketiduran (2 kali). Apakah filmnya emang jelek? Apakah filmnya membosankan? Apakah filmnya berat banget? Ato emang Jatun aja yang kurang tidur?

Inception ini film yang paling gw antisipasi di tahun 2010. (monggo di cek entry #). Christopher Nolan emang menjelma menjadi salah satu sutradara favorit gw semenjak The Dark Knight, nggak mungkin lah gw lewatin filmnya. Bahas jalan ceritanya dulu ah.

Dom Cobb (Leonardo diCaprio), bekerja sebagai seorang 'pencuri' dengan keahliannya untuk masuk ke mimpi seseorang (menggunakan alat militer blablabla gitu dah) dan mencuri IDE mereka. Tapi kali ini, dia dikasi tugas khusus bukan untuk mencuri ide, namun menanamkan ide, sebuah proses yang disebut INCEPTION. Untuk melakukannya, Cobb masuk ke mimpi didalam mimpi didalam mimpi (tiga lapis... nanti malah jadi empat wkwkwk), sebuah proses yang bisa dikatakan seru.

(this'll simplify things)

Masuk trus ngejelajahin mimpi orang... nyuri-nyuri ide di dalam pikiran si korban... konsep filmnya seru abis. Terlalu hebat malah. Konsekuensinya, jumlah eksposisi yang diperluin buat bikin para penonton ngerti konsep filmnya juga banyak.

Di setengah jam pertama, Nolan ngelemparin eksposisi yang bertubi-tubi ke penonton. Tanpa ampun. Bukan karena Nolannya cacat, tapi emang ide cerita film ini perlu eksposisi yang banyak. Sebenernya nggak susah nyerna semuanya, soalnya semua dipaparkan dengan jelas di layar, kita cuma perlu ngedengerin dan merhatiin layar. Tapi jumlahnya itu... hal yang gampang dilakukan juga kalo jumlahnya banyak lama-lama capek.

Ini yang bikin gw agak capek, dan mungkin alasan utama kenapa Jatun ketiduran. Bukan karena bosen ato nggak menarik, tapi karena capek. Capek ngedengerin penjelasan-penjelasannya. Capek mencerna semua informasi yang dipaparkan dilayar. Capek meresapin semuanya. Dan eksposisinya nggak berhenti di situ, di tengah-tengah film masih ada lagi selipan-selipan lanjutan. Huff.

Itu doang sih masalah utama gw buat film ini. Sisanya gw cuma punya pujian-pujian. Di klimaks dan penutup film ini, gw ngerasa kayak gw baru aja nyelesain sebuah petualangan besar. Kalo mau agak spesifik, dari akting (satu film aktingnya bagus semua wew, dari Leo sampe Cillian Murphy sampe Joseph Gordon-Levitt), ato spesial efeknya, semua keren.

Favorite scene: Arthur's fight in the rotating hallway and the simultaneous kick. Awesomeness. Candidates of the best movie scenes of the year, up there with Kick-Ass's warehouse scene and Toy Story's incinerator scene.

8.7/10

Before anyone shouts "HEY THAT'S TOO LOW OMGWTF!", let me defend myself by saying that I got quite offended by the sheer exposition of this movie... enough not to give this movie a 9. Hey that's just me so sod off.

Oh, and I don't want to talk about the ending. Just remembering it makes me groan... leave it to your own interpretation dammit. It's supposed to be one hell of an open ending to inspire tireless internet debates. -_-

#295 Eclipse (2010)

2010-08-29T21:08:00.003+07:00

(Jacob Black looks like a llama lol)

Ada yang bilang ke gw, diantara semua film Twilight yang udah keluar, ini yang paling bagus.

Well, as a guy who've watched all three of 'em (something I'm not proud of), I agree. But let me tell you something; the best shit, IS STILL SHIT.

3/10

Kita kembali lagi ke dunia dimana vampir nggak takut sinar matahari, manusia serigala berkeliaran kesana kemari tanpa baju, dan cewek-cewek SMA tidak bisa mengendalikan nafsu birahi mereka untuk berhubungan seks... OH WOW! Bagian yang terakhir itu cukup realistis! Ternyata ada juga yang masuk akal di film ini!

Inti cerita Eclipse:
Vampir baik dan manusia serigala yang sama baiknya bersekutu buat ngelawan gerombolan vampir jahat. Sementara itu, para penonton di bioskop harus menghadapi cinta segitiga yang memuakkan antara 3 tokoh utama yang namanya nggak perlu gw sebut lagi.

Sekarang kita masuk ke pertanyaan utama.

Kenapa gw nonton film ini? DI BIOSKOP?!

(gw nonton 2 film sebelumnya di HBO dan DVD)

Jawabannya simpel. Kita pengen ngeliat Jacob Black. Dengan 'kita', yang gw maksud adalah gw dan lima orang temen gw. COWOK SEMUA.

Tiap kali Jacob Black muncul di layar (tanpa baju tentunya), kita semua langsung takjub ngeliat bodynya dan mikir "Kapan ya gw punya badan kayak gitu?" dan ngitung kira-kira berapa cewek yang bisa kita gaet nantinya.

Udah gitu Jacob Black juga seseorang yang TIDAK MENGENAL KATA MENYERAH. Lihat saja usahanya untuk merebut hati Bella, dari awal film hingga tamat.

[Awal film]
Jacob: Bella, you're in love with me. I'm better than him.

[Pertengahan film, sebelum pertarungan]
Jacob: Bella, you're in love with me! I'm better than him!

[Waktu Jacob dikasi tau kalo Bella setuju bakal nikah sama Edward]
Jacob: BELLA! WHY?! YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH ME! I'M BETTER THAN HIM!!!

[Sehabis selesai pertarungan, Jacob sekarat dan terkapar di kasur]
Jacob: Bella... you're... in love with me... I'm better than him... arghhhh

Tenang, Jacob nggak mati kok. Badannya yang six-pack secara ajaib menyembuhkan luka-lukanya.

Di awal postingan ini gw sedikit nyentil gimana cewek-cewek SMA nggak bisa menahan nafsu birahinya. Di film ini, hal tersebut digambarkan secara brutal oleh Bella Swan, sang heroine, yang memaksa Edward untuk berhubungan seksual dengannya. Yoi. Kata kuncinya = memaksa.

Entah karena dia tolol atau goblok, Edwardnya nggak mau, dan yang terjadi berikutnya adalah salah satu adegan yang cukup membingungkan di film ini; Edward melamar Bella. Fuck. Mungkin Edward takut sama gerombolan vampir elit bernama Volturi yang dipimpin oleh Dakota Fanning, dengan kemampuan khusus mereka untuk MELEPAS HOODIE SECARA BERBARENGAN. Serem gila. Ngelepas hoodie barengan. Hii.

Jujur, tanpa segala macam tetek bengek romancenya, Eclipse sebenernya punya potensi jadi film action yang cukup seru. Potensi doang sih. Kemunculan vampir-vampir jahat, persekutuan vampir sama manusia serigala, latihan, sampe berantemnya sebenernya cukup fun. Tapi racun-racun dalam bentuk akting yang cacat sampe dialog-dialog kampungan semua masih menyelubungi film ini.

#294 Red CobeX (2010)

2010-08-27T12:53:00.005+07:00

(gw sampe males nulis sesuatu disini)

Langsung to the point aja deh. Masalah utama dari film komedi ini nggak lain adalah: Film ini nggak lucu. Sama sekali. Grrr.

Red CobeX adalah film yang tidak menceritakan tentang Red Cobex. Tapi kita sepatutnya bersyukur akan hal itu, karena Red Cobex sendiri adalah geng yang sangat menyebalkan.

Pertama, gw jelasin yang namanya Red Cobex itu apa. Red Cobex itu geng yang terdiri dari 5 orang ibu-ibu (+1 anak) dengan etnis beragam. Berhubung etnis mereka beragam, mereka WAJIB berbicara secara lebay menggunakan logat dan bahasa mereka... karena, itu satu-satunya cara untuk menunjukkan bahwa mereka berasal dari suku tertentu. Gw yakin semua orang setuju akan logika tak terbantahkan ini.

Hasilnya? Ngeselin. Tiap kali mereka ngomong dengan logat-logat mereka, gw ngerasa kesel. Capek. Bete. Karena mereka ngeganggu dan nggak lucu sama sekali.

Sebelom ada yang teriak "WOY RASIS LO!", gw nggak rasis cuq. Gw cuma ngerasa semua exploitasi logat, bahasa, dan aksen yang dilemparin sama cast Red Cobex itu nggak karuan dan menghancurkan pengalaman menonton yang gw alami.

Tadi gw nulis kalo film ini justru nggak berfokus ke Red Cobex itu sendiri. Yup, fokus film ini justru ada di Yoppie (sp?) anak laki-laki dari pemimpin Red Cobex (Tika Panggabean) yang diperankan oleh Lukman Sardi. Simpelnya, inti film ini adalah si Yoppie yang berusaha untuk meninggalkan gaya hidup premanismenya dan menjalani hidup 'normal', sekaligus mengejar pujaan hatinya, Revalina S Temat. (gw lupa nama karakternya siapa)

Ada juga subplot-subplot macam kehidupan Red Cobex di penjara dan Shanty yang memprovokasi suaminya untuk berhubungan seksual, yang sama nggak lucunya. Joke-jokenya datar dan maksa.

Gw juga mau nggak mau kepaksa buat merhatiin pencahayaan di film ini, karena gw ngerasa ada banyak adegan dimana... kerasa aneh dan nggak terlalu enak dilihat secara pencahayaan. Terutama disaat muka-muka karakternya di closeup, make up mereka sampe keliatan jelas gituh...

Satu-satunya yang bisa gw anggap positif dari film ini cuma akting-akting pemerannya. Terutama Lukman Sardi. Salut buat aktingnya sebagai Yoppie. Tapi selebih dari itu... mending gw tidur di kamar kosan.

2/10

#293 And Now, For Something Completely Different

2010-08-25T14:42:00.004+07:00

Skripsi udah kelar, koneksi internet udah nongol lagi. Saatnya untuk mulai... ngeblog lagi.

What a meaningful life.

Banyak neh tulisan-tulisan film yang numpuk. Saking banyaknya ampe bingung gw mulai dari mana. Ya udah da, satu-satu aja gw post, mulai dari yang paling pertama.

Udah gitu gw juga pengen ngepost janji foto rambut oren gw... belakangan yee.

Apa lagi yak? Ah, banyak dah. Tinggal tunggu tanggal maennya.

So for now, here's a picture of two lovely pandas doing god-knows-what.

#292 Mamah Papah Anakmu Lulus Kuliah

2010-08-24T12:19:00.001+07:00

Horeee

#291 The Sought-After Extraordinary

2010-07-29T01:42:00.002+07:00

So what the fuck is up with this blog anyway? Did the owner just abandoned it? Just what the fuck happened?

Well, DONKEY SHIT HAPPEN. That's what.

Yuk kita maen tebak-tebakan bentar. Coba, dari semua jawaban dibawah ini, tebak yang mana alasan nyata kenapa si pemilik blog jadi jarang ngeblog.

A. Si pengarang mati dan membusuk di kamar kosnya tanpa diketahui siapa pun

B. Si pengarang kehabisan duit dan lari dari Bandung demi menghindari para debt collector

C. Si pengarang diculik oleh salah satu dari sekian ribu fansnya dan disekap di basement fans gila tersebut

D. Si pengarang berkutat dengan skripsinya demi mengejar wisuda bulan Oktober

(Petunjuk: semua jawaban kecuali D adalah SALAH)

Plus, akibat mendownload (nyaris) satu season Durarara!! di bulan Juni kemarin, tagihan internet si pengarang membengkak sampai sekitar 10 juta hingga ia tidak bisa mengakses internet di kamar kosannya. Biadab.

Oleh karena itu, gw mau ngebikin pengumuman yang cukup penting. Blog ini akan masuk status HIATUS sampe sidang gw disetujuin. Nggak tau kapan. Yang jelas, udah banyak materi-materi yang udah gw tulis... kayak cerita tentang rambut oranye gw. -_-

Trus film. Red CobeX, Eclipse (seriously), Inception (I've watched this shit on the first day it comes out ffs), and The Sorcerer's Apprentice. Hurg.

Oh, dan juga Oddisey. Hari ini gw bakal cabut nonton Oddisey 2010. Tapi tulisan-tulisannya kayaknya mesti nunggu sampe... pertengahan Agustus nanti. Perkiraan kasar aja, tapi gw nyetel target lah kapan sidang gw bisa kelar...

Intinya sih, gw bakal lanjut ngeblog nanti kalo udah punya buanyak waktu luang dimana gw bisa ngebuang-buang waktu dengan ngeblog. Ja.

#290 Despicable Me (2010)

2010-07-15T09:54:00.002+07:00

(BUTT! AhAHHAhhAhh, BUTT)

Film ini bagus. Gw cukup ngerekomendasiin film ini (kecuali buat elo-elo yang entah kenapa nggak doyan ama film animasi). Emang nggak seBAGUS itu juga (Pixar etc), tapi bagus kok.

Ceritanya tentang Gru (Steve Carell), seorang Villain (penjahat -_-) yang posisinya sebagai Villain nomer satu dunia terancam akibat munculnya Villain baru yang sukses MENCURI SEBUAH PIRAMID. Caranya gimana gw juga nggak tau. Filmnya aja nggak ngasi tau. Untuk mengantisipasinya, Gru berencana untuk mencuri sesuatu yang lebih dahsyat dari pada Piramida Giza... yaitu... jeng jeng jeng

BULAN

oh wow, setidaknya mereka ngejelasin caranya begimana

Tetapi rencana Gru terancam batal oleh... bukan, bukan oleh seorang superhero, melainkan oleh 3 anak yatim piatu yang secara terpaksa diadopsi oleh Gru. Gru yang tadinya benci dan nggak peduli-peduli amat sama anak-anak itu perlahan-lahan mulai berubah jadi orang yang... penyayang... ato sejenisnya.

Konsep Despicable Me ini cukup aneh. Unik dan janggal. Gw sampe agak terheran-heran waktu nonton filmnya. Di dunianya Despicable Me, kesannya cuma ada dua jenis orang: Penjahat dan orang biasa. Nggak ada 'orang-orang baik pembela kebenaran'. Jangankan superhero, polisi dan semacamnya aja seakan nggak ada.

Gw nggak sesensitif itu sama logika cerita film beginian (di Toy Story aja mainan bisa jalan, duh), tapi di dunia Despicable Me tuh bukan "Kejahatan Merajalela", dia lebih ke "Kejahatan Adalah Suatu Hal yang Diterima Di Masyarakat". Gw juga agak bete ngomongin moral di film anak-anak, tapi mau nggak mau gw ngerasa ini janggal...

Untuk gw sendiri, komedinya 50:50. Ada yang lucu, ada yang garing. Kebanyakan yang lucu tuh melibatkan minion-minionnya Gru (makhluk kuning kecil). Komedi ini mungkin faktor paling berpengaruh di penilaian gw untuk film ini. Oh iya, buat gw sendiri, bagian yang gw anggap paling lucu tuh pas Gru ngomong "THIS IS GARBAGE" waktu ngebacain buku pengantar tidur buat anak-anak. Selera humor gw emang agak sinting <_<

Tapi selebih itu, filmnya bagus. Jalan ceritanya emang dengan mudah ketebak, Gru yang tadinya nggak peduli sama 3 anak yang dia adopsi belakang-belakang jadi peduli... yang gw salut tuh proses perubahan Gru-nya dilakukan dengan sangat baik. Walaupun kita tau terakhirnya bakal gimana, filmnya sukses ngebikin kita tetep peduli. Alur developmentnya enak, nggak maksa.

Final Score: 7/10

#289 Orange Promise

2010-07-14T15:09:00.001+07:00

Di Entry # gw membuat JANJI LELAKI untuk mengecat rambut gw jadi oranye kalo Belanda masuk final Piala Dunia.

Dan Belanda sukses masuk final Piala Dunia!

Jadi yaa gw harus menepati janji gw...

Terus kenapa sih gw ngebikin janji beginian? Gw agak terinspirasi ama temen gw Bleh... udah gitu gw emang pengen menunjukkan dedikasi aja. Fufufu.

...

oke tadinya sih gw nggak sepercaya diri itu Belanda bakal masuk final, gw kira bakal kalah ama Brazil -_-

Tapi ya udah laa! Seorang lelaki harus menepati janjinya!

#288 My 79th Trip to Singapore Part 8: I Love My Family

2010-07-14T15:08:00.000+07:00

==Di Hotel, sebelum menuju ke kosan Adek==

Nyokap: Ayo semua barang-barang dicek, jangan sampe ada yang ketinggalan.

Adek: Iya-iya.

==Di dalam taksi, menuju kosan Adek==

Bokap: Barang-barang udah lengkap semua? Cek lagi, siapa tahu ada yang kelupaan.

Adek: Iya-iya.

==Di dalam kosan Adek==

Nyokap: Udah ya, kita pulang. Barang-barang lengkap kan? Nggak ada yang ketinggalan?

Bokap: Coba cek sekali lagi. Nanti kalo ada yang ketinggalan repot lho.

Adek: Iya-iya.

==Di dalam taksi, menuju hotel==

Nyokap: Waduh, dompetnya Adek ketinggalan di tasku! Ayo muter balik ke kosan!

Gw: Zzz. Gimana sih.

==Keesokan harinya di hotel==

Bokap: Waduh, HPku ketinggalan di kosannya Adek! Sebelum ke Airport kita mesti balik ke sana dulu!

Gw: Masya Allah.

Setidaknya kita sampai ke rumah dengan selamat.

#287 My 79th Trip to Singapore Part 7: No Offense to the Indians

2010-07-14T15:01:00.001+07:00

Oke, persetan dengan segala macam tetek bengek mengenai Nudie. Setelah gw pikir-pikir, gw cukup puas sama jeans-jeans yang gw punya. Biarlah mereka udah butut (dari SMA!) dan ngebikin gw keliatan kayak koboi-koboi gitu, yang penting gw nyaman makenya. Yang namanya kepercayaan diri itu muncul bukan dari pakaian-pakaian bermerek! Ingat itu baik-baik.

pokoknya, next time ke Singapur gw mesti dapet tuh Nudie yang slim

Udah cukup persoalan belanja-belanja dan jeansnya, saatnya makan malam!

Kita makan di Little India, tempat perkumpulannya kaum etnis India di Singapur. Kayak Chinatown gitu, tapi isinya bukan orang China, orang India. Ribet yah?

Restoran tempat kita makan namanya BANANA LEAF APOLLO. Kita milih tempat ini soalnya gw belom pernah makan disini. Bokap, nyokap, sama adek gw semuanya pernah makan disini kecuali gw. Sedih dah.

Restorannya agak unik. Kita makannya di atas daun pisang gitu. Jadi abis kita duduk di meja, pelayannya bakal dateng buat ngebentangin daun-daun pisang di atas meja kita. Nanti nasi sama sayur-sayurannya dituangin di atas daun itu. Baru deh lauk-lauknya dateng. Enak-enak aja sih. Tapi gw masih bingung APOLLO di nama restorannya tuh muncul dari mana. Gw ngerti BANANA LEAFnya dateng dari mana, tapi APOLLO? Sok keren.

Gw nggak berniat rasis ya, tapi jalan-jalan d Little India ini bikin gw agak mikir-mikir. Kok tuh orang-orang India keliatan sama semua yak?

(gw pengen naro gambar disini tapi nggak ketemu yang pas)

Bukan masalah muka juga sih. Potongan rambut sama. Setelan pakaian sama. Kumis juga sama semua! Susah ngebedain satu sama yang lainnya... udah gitu, HAMPIR nggak ada cewek India yang berkeliaran sama sekali! Cowok semua! Hiiii.

#286 My 79th Trip to Singapore Part 6: This Entry is Full of Lies and Jeans

2010-07-08T11:09:00.000+07:00

(sebelum membaca postingan yang ini, SANGAT SANGAT SANGAT DIANJURKAN untuk membaca entry #125 terlebih dahulu...)

Dari Universal Studios, kita langsung cabut ke kosan adek gw. Tempatnya sama sekali nggak menarik (ya jelas, mana ada kosan yang menarik... eh tunggu, tapi kosan gw di Bandung menarik kok), tapi gw cukup tertarik sama satu kucing yang tinggal disitu. Nama kucingnya PRINCESS. Pemilihan nama yang cukup... bombastis memang. Tapi panggilannya ENCES (same pronounciation with PENCET). Jadi manggilnya "Ces! Sini Ces!" gitu. Dan entah kenapa menurut gw itu menarik.

Selesai ngaso di kosan adek gw, kita langsung cabut ke Orchard! Wuuhuu! NUDIE TIME!

Gw nggak bakal mengulang kesalahan yang gw lakukan pada saat terakhir kali gw ke Singapur. Gw masih merinding mengingat masa-masa itu... Tapi tenang, kali ini gw udah dikasi wejangan oleh temen kampus gw EMYR sang pangeran bensin dari Cirebon. Gw inget banget wejangannya:

"Lo jangan beli jeans Skinny, belinya yang Slim."

WAH

GOKIL

Emyr ini emang rajanya nasihat jeans! Nasihatnya membuka pikiran! Berbobot! Membentang sebuah cakrawala baru di pikiran gw! Yang SLIM, jangan yang SKINNY! Akh kenapa gw baru denger sekarang... berarti tahun lalu gw emang salah, karna gw milihnya yang Skinny! Okeh... kali ini gw nggak bakal mengulangi kesalahan...!

(eh tunggu, bedanya slim ama skinny apa si? gw masi ngga ngerti)

Gw dah bisa ngebayangin nih. Gw bakal beli tuh jeans SLIM. Nanti pas malem minggu, tuh jeans bakal gw pake. Gw bakal pake juga jaket himpunan SBM. Terus gw cabut ke PIM. Sendirian. BAM! Cewek-cewek langsung pada ngajak kenalan. Tinggal gw pilih-pilih. Wah, surga dunia.

Akhirnya gw ketemu satu toko yang ngejual Nudie (gw lupa di mall apa, habis mall di Orchard banyak). Yang lebih mengejutkan lagi, di pintu masuk tokonya terpampang tulisan "NUDIE JEANS 20% OFF!". DISKON!

DEMI APA LOOO?!

HAHAHA

INI EMANG HARI KEBERUNTUNGAN GW

Gw langsung masuk dengan dada membusung. Tanpa basa-basi gw langsung minta jeans Nudie Slim dengan ukuran yang cocok buat gw. Tapi si penjaga tokonya malah ngomong:

"Wah maaf mas, Nudie-nya tinggal yang Skinny."

@$%$#**&@^%#^%$#^$@!!!!!!!!

#285 My 79th Trip to Singapore Part 5: Universally Accreditated

2010-07-08T11:07:00.001+07:00

Ada sedikit masalah. Gw lupa nama tempat atraksi terakhir yang gw samperin di Universal Studios... apa yah, Rock Monster? Monster Rock Musical? Rock Opera... Monster Musical... ANJING GW LUPA!

(males googling)

Pokoknya yang itu dah! Musikal gitu, kita cuma duduk diem trus nonton pertunjukannya. Pertunjukannya ya gitu, orang-orang pake kostum monster ngedance sambil nyanyi-nyanyi. Eh, lumayan keren kok menurut gw (bahkan ada beberapa bagian yang keren banget). Cuman, gw juga nggak terlalu ngerti, tapi performancenya entah kenapa nggak bisa ngalirin antusiasme mereka ke penonton... keren abis nggak si bahasa gw? Pokoknya begitu.

Dan yang lebih parah lagi, BOKAP GW KETIDURAN!

Momennya juga nggak pas banget. Aktor-aktornya lagi pada lari muter-muter ke bangku penonton (kan ceritanya biar interaktif), terus salah satu dari mereka NGELIAT bokap gw lagi tidur dengan damainya. Ama dia disamperin, trus diteriakin

"HEY! WAKE UP!"

Bokap gw akhirnya kebangun di tengah mimpi indahnya (entah apapun itu), dia nyengar nyengir nggak karuan terus ngasi high-five ke aktornya. Gw sekeluarga cuma bisa tercengang sambil nahan malu. Untuk para aktor, mohon maaf ya, tapi harap dimaklumi kalo ruangannya emang adem dan nyaman banget, trus kita semua yang dateng dari pagi udah kecapekan... sori ye.

Selepas dari situ, kita beli suvenir-suvenir. Gw beli kaos baru, warnanya item (jarang-jarang kan gw beli kaos item) yang tulisannya Director-Director gitu. Obsesi, wkwkwk. Terus gw keinget tentang temen-temen menyedihkan gw di kampus, kayaknya boleh la ya gw beliin cemilan buat mereka.

Gw pergi ke toko Hershey's buat nyari coklat, oleh-oleh paling standar sedunia. Gw ngeliat coklat yang cukup unik, Hershey's Biggest Chocolate Bar ato apa gitu. Gede banget cuq. Gedenya sebantal gitu.

(real picture)

Harga satunya 60 dollar. Anggaplah di kelas gw ada 30 anak... 1800 dollar. Yaa gw punya duit segitu. Tapi pas gw pikir-pikir lagi ngebawanya ke Bandung bakal repot. Ya udah aja gw beli coklat standar. Buat temen-temen kelas gw yang ngebaca postingan ini: harap sabar ya minggu kemaren coklatnya ketinggalan.

#284 My 79th Trip to Singapore Part 4: Universally Accrued

2010-07-08T11:06:00.002+07:00

Tau Roller Coaster kan?

Buat sekedar info ajah, di Universal Studios ini ada 5 jenis Roller Coaster.

1. Roller Coaster biasa (duduk) buat anak-anak [Shrek]
2. Roller Coaster yang digantung buat anak-anak [Jurassic Park]
3. Roller Coaster biasa (duduk) buat dewasa [Galactica]
4. Roller Coaster yang digantung buat dewasa [Galactica]
5. Roller Coaster indoor (Mummy)

Yang buat anak-anak tuh maksudnya yang cere. Treknya pendek, nggak kenceng-kenceng amat, dan lintasannya nyantai-nyantai ajah. Cocok lah buat anak-anak ato mereka yang lemah-lemah. Sementara yang buat dewasa tuh maksudnya yang hardcore. Kebayang deh.

Sayangnya, waktu kemaren gw maen ke sini, 2 Roller Coaster yang hardcorenya belum dibuka (baru selesai dibangun beberapa minggu lalu kalo ga salah). Jadi satu-satunya Roller Coaster yang gw naikin tuh yang indoor, The Mummy's Revenge, yang gw tulis di postingan sebelumnya.

Gw sama sekali nggak nyoba dan nggak tertarik sama 2 Roller Coaster yang cere... buang-buang waktu, orang kayak gw layaknya naik Roller Coaster yang hardcore, bukan yang kroco... nggak level... nanti kalo tuh dua udah dibuka gw bakal kesini lagi buat menagih janji.

Habis dari Mummy gw cabut ke tempatnya Steven Spielberg, ngeliat simulasi badai ato apa lah. Terus gw lanjut ke Water World, semacam show extreme gitu. Lumayan seru. Jenis-jenis show dimana kalo lo salah milih tempat duduk, lo bakal basah kuyup.

Selesai dari Water World gw ngeliat sesuatu yang asyik. Makanan; SMOKED TURKEY LEG.

(nikmat)

Kayak paha ayam gitu, tapi gedenya 3-4 kali lipat dari paha ayam biasa. Harganya agak mahal, tapi sumpah bikin KENYANG. Adek ato nyokap gw aja nggak bisa ngabisin satu. Cukup beli satu udah cukup menjamin kekenyangan. Gw? Gw beli 4 dan gw habisin dalam waktu kurang dari 10 menit. Kesuksesan menanti di depan hidup gw.

#283 My 79th Trip to Singapore Part 3: Universally Acclaimed

2010-07-03T19:31:00.001+07:00

Ups, keliatannya gw melakukan sebuah kesalahan time paradox di postingan sebelumnya. Jerman vs Inggris tuh harusnya hari Minggu... bukan Sabtu. Hari Sabtu tu Uruguay vs Korsel... ya udah lah, harap dimaklumi okeh.

Di hari kedua ini gw langsung meluncur ke Universal Studios. Karna gw males ngejelasinnya, anggap aja kayak Dufannya Singapur. Amusement Park yang temanya film-film Universal Studios (Shrek, Madagascar, etc).

Di antara kita berempat, cuman Adek gw yang pernah kesini (ya iyalah). Harusnya dia jadi tourguide buat kita, tapi belakang-belakang tugasnya gw ambil alih karna gw bisa ngebikin rute yang lebih mantep.

Menuju ke tempat atraksi pertama, SHREK 4D! Tapi di perjalanan menuju tempat tersebut, kita ngeliat sebuah bangunan unik, gede gitu dengan hiasan pipa-pipa air dan tulisan WATER WORKS. Kayaknya seru!

Bokap: Wah, ini tempat apa nih? Keliatannya menarik!
Gw: Iya, antriannya pendek lagi!
Nyokap: Yuk kita kesini dulu!
Adek: Itu toilet -_-

Biadab nih Universal Studios. Toilet aja dihias kayak tempat atraksi. Gw yakin kita bukan satu-satunya orang yang tertipu... gw yakin

Pendek kata, kita langsung ngacir ke Shrek 4D. Disini, kita duduk nonton film 3D kayak di bioskop gituh, tapi kursinya bisa geter sesuai sama kejadian yang di layar. Udah gitu, misalnya di filmnya lagi basah-basahan, kita bakal disemprotin air beneran. Pokoknya kejadian-kejadian yang terjadi dilayar bisa 'dialamin' beneran sama penonton.

Berhubung gw pernah menjalani atraksi yang sama di DisneyLand HongKong, menurut gw Shrek 4D biasa ajah. Terlalu monoton. Waktu kita disemprot buat yang ke tujuh ratus empat puluh sembilan kalinya, penonton udah ngga ada yang bereaksi. Kalo di DisneyLand, disemprotnya tuh cuma 2-3 kali doang... nggak berkali-kali kayak disini, cukup buat ngasi reaksi yang maksimal ke penonton. Dah gitu lebih kreatif, ada bau-bauan harum etc...

Tujuan berikutnya: The Mummy's Revenge! Roller Coaster Indoor gitu... kata Adek gw seru. Oke deh.

Ternyata seru beneran. Heheheh. Highly recommended.

Di atraksi ini, kita bakal difoto tiba-tiba waktu naik Roller Coasternya. Berhubung gw orang yang keren dan selalu berpenampilan cool, waktu difoto gw terlihat santai dan kalem... nggak kayak pengunjung lainnya yang teriak histeris. Tadinya gw mau beli tuh fotonya, bakal gw pigura ato gw jadiin wallpaper di Laptop, trus gw kasi judul "GrimmJaw dan 15 Pecundang", tapi sayangnya harganya mahal (18 Dollar), dan gw lagi nabung buat beli jeans Nudie Skinny biar keliatan lebih gaul.

#282 My 79th Trip to Singapore Part 2: Liberated Liberator

2010-06-30T22:25:00.003+07:00

Habis check-in di Hotel Holiday Inn yang mahal dan berkelas, bokap gw ngajak pergi ke Promenade.

Gw nggak tau tu apaan, yang jelas deket-deket Esplanade sono.

Kata bokap gw ada gedung keren baru selesai dibangun. Kerennya kayak apa gw nggak ngerti, apa lagi ini dateng dari bokap gw yang ngecat rambutnya jadi oren. Ugh.

Ternyata bangunannya... biasa aja. Saking biasanya gw sampe lupa nama dan detail-detailnya. Ada kasinonya, tapi gw belom boleh masuk. Belom cukup umur. Biadab. Mereka nggak tau mereka berhadapan dengan siapa. Ini GrimmJaw si raja poker, kalo gw diijinin masuk gw porak porandain tuh kasino dengan skill poker gw yang luar biasa. Terakhir kali gw ke Vegas, gw sampe diusir dengan halus gara-gara gw menang mulu dan dealernya stress... cih.

Di gedung ini juga ada... kayak sungai kecil gitu di tengahnya. Ada perahu-perahu gitu, lo bisa bayar 20 dollar (seinget gua) nanti lo boleh naik terus muter-muter.

Disini, gw puas ngetawain orang-orang bodoh yang bayar dan naik tuh perahu. Woy! Kayak gituan mah di Indo banyak! Murah lagi! Ngga nyampe 20 dollar, gopek juga bisa! Naik getek noh buat nyebrang... lebih seru, outdoor pula... udah gitu kalo kecebur jadi perjuangan menyelamatkan nyawa... jadi ada tantangannya... seru gila...

Habis itu kita langsung ke Orchard. Ke mall yang namanya Mandarin ato apa gitu buat makan sekalian liat-liat. Gw pengen liat bioskop di Singapur. Keren juga. Doc-docnya berhamburan dimana-mana... nggak sebanyak di Indo. Marketing filmnya jadi kerasa lekat banget. Boleh laaah.

Gw belom pengen belanja baju hari ini, jadi gw cabut ke Kinokuniya di Takashimaya. Beli buku! Ini baru namanya belanja yang bermanfaat... gw beli dua buku: Komik Kick-Ass sama buku Creating the Movie & Comicnya.

(one of the book that I bought)

Keren cuq komiknya. Sadis pula. Coba, di komiknya ada:

-Orang pelernya disetrum
-Orang pelernya ditembak
-Orang kepalanya ditembak sampe otak + bola matanya kemana-mana
-Orang dibakar hidup-hidup

Pas di hotel, Jerman vs Inggris udah mulai. Dan... Jerman menang! YEAH! HA? APA LU BILANG?! GOL LAMPARD DIANULIR?! ITU NAMANYA KARMA! HAHAHAH!

sudahlah fans inggris diluar sana, jangan sedih ya, ini untuk kalian

SKOR AKHIR

GERMANY = 4
EMILE HESKEY FC = 1